Angry Little Tank

2007-04-24T06:43:00.000-04:00

I'd let Sheryl Crowe touch ME, and I'm GAY

At first I didn't think much of the news that broke Sunday afternoon that Laurie David and Sheryl Crowe caused a bit of a stir at the annual Correspondent's Dinner. For one thing, that dinner is only interesting if Colbert is nailing those jackasses to the wall. For another thing, I just assumed that Crowe and David used Rove as so much PR backdrop in order to promote their global warming awareness tour. Lord knows that jackass has chewed and spit out countless poor souls to further his twisted agenda, who cares if he comes off looking like even more of an evil bastard at some jerk off dinner to honor the steno pool that is our Washington press corp.

But Glenn Greenwald had more of a novel take. This whole incident kind of shines a light on the whole sorry bunch. Journalists dressing up in black tie to hobnob with the powerful and famous (Sanjaya was there?) to make themselves feel important. The fig leaf of journalistic integrity they meekly hold forth whenever called on how they get everything wrong wrong wrong suddenly just drops once a year and you see these people for who they are. Pathetic celebrity wanna-bes. Desperate to be close to people who have power, who have fame. To curry their favor and advocate for their wars.

Those who cross the line like Crowe and David are ridiculed. As Glenn says:

These journalists and political operatives excitedly invite Hollywood celebrities to their parties so they can feel celebrated and glamorous, and then spend the next day condescendingly mocking the celebrities they invited and spent all night eagerly fondling, all in order to feel superior and elevated above the muck ("ha, ha -- as though Sheryl Crow (whom we invited and chased around hoping to speak with) knows anything about global warming or other Important Political Things! Ha ha!").

Indeed.

I haven't forgotten about blogging the Middle East as I indicated in last week's post. I just got a new camcorder and went to the zoo to try it out. I'm now editing the whole thing with iMovie, which is probably the coolest thing (in a long line of things) that Mac users get that you PC users don't. I'll get on the Middle East in a bit.....don't want to OD on outrage or anything.

2007-04-18T19:07:00.000-04:00

Guess we'll just have to do it ourselves

I was listening to Bob Edwards during the commute last week and heard Jim MacNeil (of MacNeil/Lehrer fame) talk about his upcoming series on PBS "Crossroads". I was mildly interested in the premise which is to basically try and unravel current US/Middle East relations with a series of two hours movies. I figured if anybody could try and tackle it in our impoverished news culture it would be PBS.

Then I heard they were devoting one two hour movie to Richard Perle. You know, its true. If there's one advocacy group whose perspective just hasn't been getting heard these past six years its been the neocons and Richard Perle. Those guys just NEVER seem to get what they want.

I also heard they were doing a profile on Irshad Manji. I'll always remember her as the obnoxious loudmouth who showed up on Bill Maher in early 2005 to declare that the "purple finger revolution" was going to radically alter the Middle East. Best of all - she did this while raising her index finger and slowly nodding her head up and down, not unlike some sort of retarded suburban housewife "testifying" at a Whitney Houston concert. Clearly war cheerleaders need yet another forum, we haven't heard nearly enough justifications for this ill fated endeavor from our current media outlets.

All I could do was sigh (yet again) and wonder what in the hell happened to intellectual rigor in this country (again).

Then I read this article at Salon.com earlier this week. The author, Gary Kamiya, seems to share my frustration in how little intellectual curiosity the American media seems to possess in regard to our dangerously poor Middle East relations.

This paragraph really jumped out at me:

Here's what "Crossroads" should have included. First, it should have devoted one film to this war of ideas, giving each side its due. Then it should have commissioned another film offering a historical survey of the Middle East starting in 1798, when Napoleon invaded Egypt, and ending today. This film would have looked at French and British colonialism and its effects on the development of Arab democracies. It would have talked about the Sykes-Picot Agreement that betrayed Arab nationalist hopes after WWI, and Great Britain's imperialist misadventures in Iraq, which so closely resemble our own. The Palestinian naqba, or catastrophe, would be covered. The film would examine the U.S.-backed coup in 1953 that removed Iranian leader Muhammad Mossadegh. The Suez crisis, the failure of Arab nationalism, America's long proxy war with the USSR in the Middle East, the Six-Day War and 1973 October war, and U.S. hypocrisy in dealing with Saddam Hussein would all be discussed. The Algerian government's fateful decision in 1991 to suspend elections when it became clear Islamists were going to win -- a decision followed by an appalling civil war that killed 200,000 people -- would be covered. And it would have looked at Israel's 2006 war against Lebanon.

Half of these events (the Sykes-Picot Agreement?) I'm ashamed to say I've never even heard of prior to reading this article. But that's no excuse for not learning about them now. Armed with Wikipedia and my dwindling spare time I hope to start covering these topics in the hopes of arriving at a better understanding of how we find ourselves in an intractable and unwinnable war.

If anybody has anything to add about any of these topics let me know and I'll post it. The idea would be to get some sort of real conversation going.

Because if you're waiting for the US media to provide you with any information aside from the identify of Anna Nicole Smith's baby daddy, you're going to be sorely disappointed.

2007-04-04T18:27:00.000-04:00

To paraphrase Robert Plant...

"If there's a bustle in your hedgerow, don't be alarmed now...its just some sort of glowering bald douchebag"

2007-03-27T06:46:00.000-04:00

Clueless cackling jackals

Want a quick three minute summary of the current state of American journalism? Watch this pathetic three minute video of Chris Matthews yukking it up with four other media superstars over how awful its going to be for Democrats if they pursue investigations into the politically motivated firings of US District Attorneys (God it felt dirty just to TYPE that).

For the record, polling conducted over the weekend indicates that over 72% of Americans WANT this matter investigated and pursued.

Want to know how we find ourselves in our an unwinnable quagmire? Want to know how our political discourse has become a kindergardenesque babble of lies? Take another look at this video.

2007-03-25T10:14:00.000-04:00

Don't tell me the French aren't brave

Any nation that would eat something like this clearly has some steel in its spine. We came across this restaurant and this gory dish when making reservations for our trip to France in May. We're going to have one decadent (read expensive) lunch and one decadent dinner.

So yeah, you can look forward to long winded boring blog posts in June about Parisians and food.

2007-03-20T22:25:00.000-04:00

Karma is indeed a bitch

Anybody who deigns to chastise the Democrats for recently backing out of a scheduled Presidential debate that was to broadcast on Fox News, should watch this video. And then watch it again.

This is not a legitimate news organization. There is no reason for anybody to continue to treat it as such. There's certainly no reason to support it by allowing it to broadcast one of the Democratic debates.

These people are supposedly fans of the magical hand of the market. Well, we're taking our dollars elsewhere due to general inability to do anything buy ferociously fellate far right interests.

Deal with it pussies.

2007-03-18T10:55:00.000-04:00

Better know a douchebag

Not content to simply portray weakness and indecision to the point where the public doesn't know what Democrats stand for, it seems as though the Democratic "leaders" we've been suffering under since the early 90's are now concerned with Stephen Colbert.

I only WISH I was joking.

Rahm Emmanuel is the very same douchebag that urged Democrats to get behind Bush in 2003 when real debate on this stupid war was needed. Rahm Emmanuel is the very same douchebag who cheerled this war long after it was evident to even our sycophantic press that everything was going downhill (like so many people, not Democrats mind you, said it would). Rahm Emmanuel is the very same douchebag who ridiculed Howard Dean's 50 state strategy that made efforts to reach out to people in each corner of this nation, as if people in Alabama aren't worth our time or effort. He comes from the Joe Lieberman school of kissing the ass of every GOP pundit in the hopes of currying their favor.

And now this guy is urging all Democratic congressmen to avoid going on Colbert's show? Yeah because God knows having our leaders on one of the hippest shows on TV can only hurt at this point, right? The reason given is as condescending as it is stupid, this jackass thinks people won't realize that having congressmen talk about cocaine or elminating species from the planet won't be seen as a joke.

Its long past time we got rid of people like this. They think we're idiots and they treat us accordingly. If we're going to get out of this mess we find ourselves in, people like Rahm Emmanuel need to be ignored. Completely. I sincerely hope this segment on Stephen's show becomes more popular than ever after this.

2007-03-15T19:31:00.000-04:00

Where ya been?

One of the main reasons I've been neglecting my blog is my recent purchase of a 40 inch Sony LCD HDTV. As we speak I'm rawking out to Foo Fighters doing "Monkey Wrench" in my living room. David Grohl looks like he's about to kiss me, I kind of dig it.

If you can afford it, I highly recommend you make the jump to digital. Its unreal how awesome everything looks. There's a whole world of programming you know nothing about unless you go digital. "Sunrise Earth" on Discovery HD which basically showcases sunrises around the world. Hour long programs of cameras set up in Yosemite. Crazy full length concerts like Rush. I just watched Kiss for crying out loud (by the way, makeup ain't keepin you guys from looking old guys).

Don't even get me started on gaming on this thing.

So yeah, bitching about Bush or the morons at work hasn't seemed so important recently. Though I'm sure bullshit like this will have me directing my ire towards DC in a bit. For now I'm gonna go play with my HD Wii.

2007-03-14T20:05:00.000-04:00

Its official - outrage overload

As any frequent reader of this blog could attest (and if there are any out there after my very infrequent posting, uh...welcome back?) I have a short fuse. Lord knows the lack of anything resembling any semblance of intelligence in our "leadership", our politics, our journalism, and our discourse has been pretty in our face for the last six years or so. Hence Angry Little Tank was born.

Then I discovered this guy. Talk about depressing. I don't think the internet has ever had a talent quite like Glenn Greenwald. He's able to articulate his rage and call out these assholes in a way that nobody else has been able to in my lifetime. I'm not exaggerating. Do your brain a favor and read him every day.

I wrestled with the idea of closing this blog down in light of his recent higher profile gig at Salon. Then I said, you know what? Fuck that. There's plenty of rage to go around. I could riff off the jackasses in my neighborhood and never cease to amuse myself. Work is a goldmine of idiocy as well, waiting for sardonic skewering in blog form.

And who says I can't dip my toe in political rage in blog form as well? Hell in the six weeks or so since I last graced the blogosphere we've learned of Gonzales' Justice Department firing US attorneys who weren't sufficiently partisan, our wounded soliders recuperating in rat infested hellholes, Democratic inability to end this stupid fucking war, and the continuing decline of American journalism.

But what has inspired me to vent my spleen this evning?

Garrison Fucking Keillor. David Rakoff skewers this jackass rightly. Its one thing to hear some Republican mock gay marriage. They've been obsessed with gay sex since firmly shutting their closet door and turning on the AM radio. But an NPR darling who has been married three times telling us that we have no right to be together? Fuck you asshole.

I never thought that cornball Lake Wobegone shit was funny. In fact I thought his whole shctick was creepy. Now I know why.

Its been said a thousand times before, but more frequent blogging going forward. Seriously.

2007-02-06T18:46:00.000-05:00

Don't put them Depends on girl, he ain't worth it!

In what can only be described as a sad interweaving of Cops, CSPAN, and The Golden Girls, we learned today of an astronaut who drove almost a thousand miles overnight to stalk her boyfriend (who is ALSO an astroanut) and his new girlfriend.

Apparently this woman packed a bunch of trash bags, a knife and a lot of rubber tubing (huh?) in her station wagon and headed out from Houston to Cape Canaveral because she "wanted to talk".

The best part?

Police allege Nowak drove 950 miles (1,529 km) from Houston to Orlando -- wearing adult diapers so she would not have to stop to urinate -- and disguised herself in a dark wig, glasses and trench coat to confront her rival, Colleen Shipman, who according to media reports is a captain in the U.S. Air Force.

Now I'll admit, this guy is kind of hot. I can see myself driving a few hours to do some stalking for him, sure. I gotta draw the line at being so urgent at getting my stalkin on that I plan ahead on pissing in my pants. Repeatedly.

I mean I'm sure the urination situation in space prepares you for some, let's say uncomfortable situations, but how long does it take to stop in at a Wendy's and urinate before you go chop your ex's new girlfriend into a million bits?

I guess the good news is that after spending two weeks in a space capsule she'll be uniquely qualified to deal with the frequent delousings and bouts in solitary confinement she'll be participating in for...let's say....5-10.

2007-02-04T20:52:00.000-05:00

I say no to Stupidity Day

I agree 100% with Andrew Sullivan about just turning your back on the idiotic hype that grips the US each year in the form of the "Super Bowl". The pre-game shows that begin at noon. The oh so amusing corporate ads that cost millions. The immense importance all must surely feel in watching heavily padded steroid abusers run a ball up and down an astroturf field in 10 second spurts.

You can keep it.

Anybody who has even a rudimentary knowledge of the game of rugby outside of "don't you guys get naked when you score" knows already that the NFL is a sham. Everything good about team sports has been hyped beyond recognition. Everything is awash in piles of corporate cash. From the bloated millions made by the players to the $6 hot dogs the endless parade of drunken stadium patrons must pay simply for the privelage of watching the whole sorry spectacle.

30 guys on a grass pitch on a crisp fall morning playing two 40 minute halves. Afterwards everyone goes for a pint. I'll go watch that instead thanks.

2007-02-02T20:59:00.000-05:00

Fuck the New Republic, or Flip on the light switch and watch them all scatter

I have a confession to make. I used to subscribe to the New Republic. I mean for YEARS. I readily listened to their ramblings about the relationships between the hand of the free market and the spread of democracy throughout the world. I eagerly awaited the next rambling from Provincetown from editor Andrew Sullivan (oh my God, is that what he looks like?! That's one Republican I'd bend over and....), and I never questioned that the opinions of the editors were those of an enlightened and evolved liberal intelligentsia.

Yes we were going to ride Bill Clinton's unique brand of laissez faire economics coupled with common sense social legislation right into the 21st century and beyond. The fact that Newt Gingrich and that gang opposed the entire idea just made it seem that much more attractive.

Then the war happened. Suddenly the real agenda of the New Republic became clear. Keep the liberals on the reservation at all costs. Make them think that their nutty ideas were never going to be taken seriously so the best thing to do would be to just try and go along with whatever the Republicans wanted. Or better yet, try and come up with new and better justifications for going to war than the the neo-cons ever could.

Who can forget the famous cases for war issue of the New Republic with nuclear mushroom cloud on the cover? Their endorsement of Joe Lieberman for president? Their near constant fellating of Bush's war plans. Which war plans you ask? Uhhh..that would be all of them.

One of the greatest joys I had in 2003 was cancelling my subscription after 8 years. I'm taking even greater joy in learning that I wasn't alone. Most people are seeing these jackasses for who they really are and circulation has plummeted to Limbaugh Letter levels.

Of course being caught red handed engaging in sock puppetry or being an outright racist while publishing your vile little screeds doesn't help either.

My new favorite thing to do? Get out the thickest black Sharpie we own and scrawl "Lieberman for President? FUCK YOU!!!" on all of the subscription renewal offers we receive every other week and then mail them back to TNR in the postage paid envelope.

RIP enabling DINO rags..wherever you are.

2007-01-31T20:49:00.000-05:00

Will no one play with my Wii?

36 year old emotionally stunted gay man seeks other like minded individuals for long saturday afternoons handling my Wiimote. Feel free to bring your own peripherals as I'm extremely open minded. Interests include androgynous anti-heros, homoerotic JRPG side quests, and Guitar Hero. Bass players step to the front of the line.

Also looking for gay only Wii handlers to participate in my unique vision of a Mii gay parade. Prizes will be awarded for gayest virtual costume as well as most sexy and sexiest Mii bear.

If anybody has any idea what I'm talking about.....holla?

2007-01-28T11:09:00.000-05:00

Here's your new f*@!ing post!

Blogging has been light recently due to a pretty crazy work schedule. I was taken to task last night about posting new content, so time to get back on the wagon.

Suffice it to say, life sucks right now. Long hours down at the client and a high level of stress. I was handling it well up to a point, but then I gradually just started to get more and more upset about it. A toxic brew of long hours, demanding requests and antagonistic attitudes all around.

This is the first weekend I've had off in a while, hopefully once I catch my breath my mood will improve. I'd like to think this whole experience is at least teaching me stress management skills, but looking back on some of the outbursts I had while on the job I'd have to say I let the stress get to me just a bit.

I long for the day I can retire and stop dealing with accounting. The crushing deadlines that force human beings to live in flourescent lit cubicle prisons. The insecurities that mask themselves in the form of arrogance and aggression. People weren't meant to live like this. The money is OKAY, but not enough to warrant this "lifestyle".

Of course this could just be a bad case of winter blues.

Compounding my foul mood is my recent distancing myself from the rugby team. I mean it was totally necessary as I can't play with my knee and treasury work was becoming a ridiculous proposition. I was beginning to feel taken advantage of. Still, seeing the rugby guys out now is just DIFFERENT. Was our entire friendship based on the team, the absence of which causes our reason to be friends to no longer exist?

Damned if I know, but that whole thing is bringing me down too.

The one bright spot? Tickets have been bought for a nice long vacation in May to France. A few days in Paris, a few days in wine country, a few more days in Paris. Its the only thing keeping me sane right now.

I promise more frequent and less maudlin postings in the future.

Update: Upon further reflection I'm going to guess that all of the above is largely due to my quitting smoking. Three weeks and counting, wish me luck.

2007-01-10T20:19:00.000-05:00

Oh so THIS is what all those support the troops stickers mean...

Every once in a while the oh-so-serious far right "analysts" who have laid this country low with their ill conceived ideas and ruthless bullying let their mask slip a little. Then you get to see them for the manipulative and hateful bastards they are.

Take the geniuses at National Review, breeding ground for pretty much every ill conceived idea we've seen the last 50 years or so. Michael Ledeen has had just about enough of those gold bricking troops over in Iraq

Note that an increase in embeds doesn’t necessarily require an increase in overall troop strength. We’ve got lots of soldiers sitting on megabases all over Iraq. They should be out and about, some of them embedded, others just moving around, tracking the terrorists, hunting them down. I don’t know how many guys and gals are sitting in air-conditioned quarters and drinking designer coffee, but it’s a substantial number. Enough of that.

I'm not sure how many guys and gals over at the National Review are sitting in air conditioned quarters drinking designer coffee, but I'm gonna go out on a limb and say all of them.

2007-01-09T19:10:00.000-05:00

Fuck Disney and ABC

Not content to merely give a platform for right wing misinformation, it seems as though ABC, and by extension their parent company Disney, has now resorted to pathetically policing the blogosphere for anyone who dare challenge their god given right to spew hate driven, violent, and borderline psychotic filth over the publicly owned airwaves.

It seems as though someone who had enough of listening to a bunch of cackling jackels on a morning drive time program on ABC affiliate KSFO in San Francisco (!) joke about some oh so funny topics such as:

Sussman asking a caller to prove that he is not a Muslim: "Say Allah is a whore. ... Say that you love eating pig."

Rodgers on Indonesia: "Indonesia is really just another enemy Muslim nation. ... You keep screwing around with stuff like this, we're going to kill a bunch of you. Millions of you."

decided to do something about it and notify the advertisers for this morning program just exactly what kind of people their companies were supporting.

Well hath no fury like a fascist entertainment mega-corporation scorned. Disney soon unleashed the hounds on blogger Spocko and forced his ISP to yank his blog in protest of his including excerpts from this idiotic gang of violent troglydites.

Well here's your first lesson how the internet works guys. Click on the links below to listen to the some of the leading lights of the conservative movement. Warning: you may need a shower afterwards.

ABC wants caller to say Allah is a whore

Caller to ABC radio program wants Syrian mosques bombed

ABC radio host wants detainee fingers and penises cut off

ABC radio host and Ann Coulter (who else?) want liberals killed

ABC radio program asserts that Islam is a false religion

ABC radio hosts think Senator Obama is "halfrican"

ABC radio wants to attack the New York Times

ABC radio warns that "unpleasant things are going to happen to liberals"

ABC radio suggests that AP reporters commit mass suicide

Kind of takes the shine off that straight to DVD edition of "Little Mermaid 2"
doesn't it?

Update: Apparently Spocko has found an ISP provider with some balls and is back on the web. In a world full of sycophantic authoritarian lickspittles, its nice to see someone unafraid to stand up and tell the truth, visit his site for the complete story.

2007-01-06T08:49:00.000-05:00

It begins...

Its hard not to have a glimmer of hope for this country while reading this letter newly empowered Democrats sent to the President urging him to get our troops the hell out of the mess he created. At long last, the days of Democrats meekly agreeing that "Iraq is part of the war on terror" or "Capturing Saddam makes us safer, Dean is wrong" seem to be over.

Of course bubble boy is going to plow forward with this war no matter what. His ego demands it.

Meanwhile the 30% of the country that desperately cling to the notion of a 1000 year Republican reich by refusing to admit the realities of the past six years have been busy trying to convince the rest of us that things are going A-OK. One particularly funny yet sad episode is outlined by Glenn Greenwald in this post which eviscerates the right wing blogosphere by pointing out how (yet again) their shrieking hysterics are proven to be wrong.

I'll let you read it, as Glenn nails it far better than I could summarize it. Suffice it to say that these people will go to any lengths, no matter how preposterous, in order to maintain the false reality they live in. There is literally no fact that will shake their unalterable world view that Republicans are our benevolent overlords and anyone who says otherwise is a traitor or worse.

Even this low trafficked blog gets its share of idiotic hate mail. One received this morning reads in part:

the war is not stupid, you are. If this attitude was around during WW II, we would now be seig heiling hitler.

I'm also called a racist and a snob because I don't watch football. Actually I'll own that one, but really who wouldn't seem like a snob next to Kindergarten level crap like this? These people make Pauley Shore look like Camus.

Bottom line? We have cause for hope but we have a long way to go before this country starts approaching anything resembling sanity again. I for one am looking forward to a very intersting year ahead.

2007-01-01T19:58:00.000-05:00

Looking ahead

Well here we go with our newest year - 2007. Its so cliche to take stock at this time of year, but really how can you not? What happened in 2006 of note for me?

I finally received CPA certification after passing my test a while back. It involved basically scrounging my old company for any kind of attestation work I could find and then convincing my former boss to sign off on it, but after an interview in April I received my certificate in June. A milestone of sorts and a firm reminder that at the age of 36 I will most likely remain an accountant for some time to come. At least the money is decent.

To continue on the work related theme, I finally ditched the job I hated and got a new one in the consulting field. While I loved my old boss, I was bored out of mind surfing the internet the entire day. I guess that's what happens when you have a staff of four CPA's performing Sarbanes/Oxley related work for a company that was sold and no longer public. As 404 control identifications take a backseat, you become more and more obsolete. It wasn't a good feeling and I'm glad I'm out of the situation. While I certainly don't see myself doing consulting forever, it will allow me to get experience I never would have seen at the old place and it started my salary climb to something closer to market rates. Could be worse

If you're still awake after all that, we could take a look at the home front

After a very enjoyable ski weekend last February I was excited to start spring rugby practice thinking the knee injury I received last fall was all healed. In fact that was not the case.

The entire year was basically spent on the sidelines doing treasury related work for the team while wondering how in the hell I would be able to take four weeks off work to get the needed operation to fix it. Never really figured that out and the new job in September put the entire thing on hold.

So rugby is on hold for a while...but I did have fun with it while it lasted. I had a blast at Bingham Cup.

Thom and I celebrated five years together this fall. I couldn't be happier.

We managed to have a nice vacation in August, going to visit my mother in Florida and then flying up to Provincetown for a nice four day sojourn. Like everything else that seemed to happen this year, it was low key and enjoyable.

Who could forget the kitchen remodeling?. Between a contractor that disappeared for weeks on end and our friend who began to take the project WAY too personally 2006 will always be remembered as the year we broke our cherry on stressful home improvement projects.

I enjoyed the Winter Olympics in Turino, the World Cup in Germany and the Tour de France. Seeing as I watched NO NFL, NBA, MLB, or NHL I believe that officially makes me a sports snob. Sorry, but American sports are rife with hype, my eyes glaze over after my 3rd truck commercial.

Of course the greatest event of the year had to be the November elections. Finally a sign that we've stopped seeing turbaned terrorists around every corner and see these people for who they really are. Now if we can just kill the idea that we need to keep fighting this stupid war forever we'll be getting somewhere. While I don't trust Democrats to do the right thing, at the very least we'll have slowed these bloodtirsty morons down for a while.

Looking ahead to the next year I'm looking forward to having more free time on weekends now that rugby has taken a back seat in my life. We just bought our plane tickets for a 10 day trip to Paris in May. The idea of that is what is going to keep me going through the winter. A co-worker of mine helped me procur a Wii, so I anticipate many Saturday afternoons while Thom is at work flailing away upstairs in front of the TV.

Here's hoping for the best for everyone in my life...you know who you are. Here's to also documenting as much as possible on these pages.

Happy New Year

2006-12-20T21:57:00.000-05:00

Hey Cuntface McGhee!!

You know what I find MOST annoying about working in the business world? Having to deal with douchebags who believe everything they read in the op-ed pages. Some jackass like Friedman claims that outsourcing is the wave of the future and kneejerk boardrooms across the land readily sell out this country's future in the hopes of raising their stock prices $1.

But people are starting to get wise. Check out this exquisite evisceration of Anne Applebaum who's been subjecting us to her almost always wrong "analysis" in the pages of the Washington Post for far too long. A better summation of how wrong wrong wrong all of the opinion makers and "leaders" are that we've had to endure lo these many years I have not read.

That and that fact that I love the idea of calling her and her ilk "Cuntface" make this a must read.

You're next Gloria Borger

2006-12-09T20:28:00.000-05:00

Rankin and Bass you slay me

I'm not usually one given to sentimentality, but whenever I watch these old Christmas TV programs that get hauled out every year I just start crying. Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, A Year Without a Sanata Claus, Frosty The Snow Man, all were done by those masters of 70's animation Rankin and Bass.

If you grew up during the 70's you no doubt remember the thrill and excitment that would erupt whenever CBS played that intro during the holiday season that indicated regular programming was being pre-empted. Mom would call out "Kids! Rudolph's on!" and have hot chocolate ready for us as we scrambled into the living room in our pajamas. While the Christmas lights played in the background my brothers and I sat transfixed and watched these things year after year.

Now I'm all grown up and piling these same programs up on my DVR. I can't watch them without getting a little choked up. For Mom, who had so much fun watching them each year and for my brothers who were there with me each year in our pj's. Christmas just wouldn't be the same without it.

2006-12-02T11:40:00.000-05:00

Casino Royale - GO SEE THIS MOVIE

I saw Casino Royale last night and was completely blown away. I've always kind of been a Bond fan since seeing a Friday night broadcast of "Thunderball" on ABC one night as a kid. The exotic locales, the espionage intrigue, and let's face it Sean Connery in his prime parading around in Bermuda shorts. As a long time fan I feel comfortable making the following statement:

This new Bond movie is the best one ever done.

Gone are the silly gadgets and stupid banter. There is no billionaire supervillain intent on world domination that must be stopped. This is gritty, realistic, and gripping human drama done extremely well. The movie opens in black and white as we watch Bond on his first kill (you must make two for "double 00" designation). From there we watch an immature and inexperienced Bond on his first assignment in the world of international espionage.

The new actor is Daniel Craig and to say he's a powerful screen presence would be the height of understatement. He sears his way into every scene with a remarkable range of depth and talent. Even Sean Connery tended to be a bit of a one dimensional "superman". Craig's bond is very human. Prone to error, sometimes ruled by emotion. Like all of us. Its extremely refreshing, to the point that you wonder why it took over 30 years to go in this direction with the franchise.

I could go on, but trust me if you are at all interested in an intelligent gripping well acted action film - go see Casino Royale.

2006-12-01T13:12:00.000-05:00

Happy Festivus!

Who can forget that December 1 is Festivus? Not me I tells ya. In the spirit of the holiday I'm gonna rant about something stupid that bothers me.

Phantom of the Opera is playing here in Philly at the Forrest Theater. The nearest parking garage to the venue is the same one I use when I go the gym. As such, I get to watch all the suburbanites drive into town in their SUV's and completely lose their minds. How you ask?

Imagine a white family of four dressed up wandering around a parking garage with a parking ticket in their hands asking me fearfully "what do we do with this?". Imagine 50 year old women standing slack jawed in front of the machine you use to pay your parking ticket panicking and wondering what to do. Imagine the same family from above stopping you on the corner of 12th and Walnut asking "where's the Forrest Theater?" when its half a block up the street and lit up like Nuremburg circa 1944.

I know the suburbs are quiet and all, but this is pathetic. If you can't figure out how to drive into a metropolitan city in America, park your car and then see a show you should confine yourself to a Blockbuster evening.

Anybody else have a pet peeve they wish to air. You know, in the spirit of the holiday?

2006-11-28T22:10:00.000-05:00

My GOD this is depressing

I usually listen to NPR (check that...XMPR, I went sattelite two years ago) on the drive down to work each morning. This particular morning I migrated over to Air America Radio during a particularly grating performance by a bluegrass/swing combo out of upstate NY.

Side note: if you're a bluegrass swing outfit from upstate NY...just yeah stop.

Anyway, I just tuned when the three hosts were welcoming Michael Isikoff from Newsweek. Oh shit...Newsweek. I mean I kind of expected vapid airless "analysis" but I was completely unprepared for what spewed forth.

I was forced to battle traffic heading south on I-95 while listening to this ass clown breathlessly describe the "drama" behind newly elected (but not yet in power) House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's choice for chair of the House Intelligence Committee. Apparently the annointed DC chattering class has decided that Jane Harman (who desperately wants the chair) is now a "moderate" who clashes with "liberal" Pelosi.

Tittering like a 15 year old girl in the bathroom during study hall this twit described in great detail how we had "two women" with "all that comes with that" fighting it out because they "don't like each other". Forget that Harman has been quoted as saying:

"There's a strong intelligence case that Iraq has not destroyed its weapons of mass destruction and is building the capability to use them," said Rep. Jane Harman (D-Calif.), ranking member of the House intelligence committee. "There's a growing al Qaeda presence in Iraq, and I think the case can be made that there is a growing affiliation" between Baghdad and terrorist groups.

Forget that the American people have just elected Pelosi as speaker hoping and praying that she would change this kind of idiotic dribble, let's concentrate on the CAT FIGHT.

Is there a better example of how and why we find ourselves in our current predicament? Abdicating any sense of resonsibility he SHOULD feel to report a real news story, Isikoff and his pathetic tribe are content to gossip and discuss Armani suits while real issues such as civil war breaking out around 140,000 US troops gets relegated to sideshow status.

Even more pathetic was how little he was challenged by the "liberal" hosts. After being told that this was "good stuff", Isikoff was presented a rather lame argument that by opposing people like Harman (you know, like the American people clearly WANT) that Pelosi was sending a message that you can't cross the party.

Clearly flummoxed to have to start thinking a bit Isikoff stuttered towards some sort of explanation that none of this mattered anyway and we wouldn't be talking about it in three months.

Then why are you giggling like a school girl during drive time radio about it while Baghdad burns jackass?

I've gotten more in depth analysis watching water pour down a drain. I long for the day that magazines like Newsweek and Time are ignored for the worthless rags they've become. The American people arrived at this juncture where we can actually begin to reverse the insanity these inane chatterboxes have enabled despite their worthless "analysis", not because of it.

2006-11-27T19:47:00.000-05:00

Catching Up

I purposefully took off a bit after the November 7th elections, but I guess its time to get back in the saddle with this whole blogging thing. Also I'm feeling kind of reflective. Year end and all that jazz...

I could talk about the lingering mendacity of our corrupt "leaders" and their inept cheerleaders who tried (in vain thankfully) to convince us that the Iraqis became more violent BEFORE the election to try and get Democrats elected, and then got more violent still AFTER the election because they were newly emboldened by Republican losses.

But why bother, clearly nobody can take what this ilk says seriously anymore. We're going to start heading in a different direction without any further idiocy from the likes of these morons.

I could talk about recently coming out at work, but in fact it wasn't as bad as I feared. I should be able to take my partner with me to the Christmas party without it becoming a hassle. Well, no more a hassle than corporate Christmas parties are in general.

Instead I'll just mention that with a mixture of relief and sadness I'm ending my tenure as treasury of my rugby club with Sunday with election of new officers. This past year was a very emotional one for me with rugby. I found out about my torn ACL in the spring, which effectively ended any more playing, yet I was stuck being treasurer for the rest of the year. I had fun hanging with the team and I think I made some meaningful contributions to both the financial infrastructure and health of the team, but at what cost? I ended up running myself into the ground with administrative details. What's worse, I ended up resenting many people on the team after feeling frankly unappreciated.

If somebody is taking the time and effort to help you out, a good rule of thumb is to avoid telling them they need to do even more.

It was a learning experience and one I don't regret doing, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't looking forward to just being a spectator for a while. I wish these guys the best, they deserve it. Just the best from somebody else for a while.

I hope to post more this month on the war on Christmas, which clearly I'm going to violently wage since I'm not a Republican and all. As John Stewart so succinctly put it:

I will not rest until every December 25 families gather together at Osama's homo-abortion commie jizzporium

2006-11-08T00:05:00.000-05:00

Quote of the Night

All you Republicans who ran away from the president are going to have to wander throught he desert for the next two years. And I mean literally, somebody's going to have to replace those troops in Iraq.

Stephen Colbert

Congratulations America, let's get to work.

2006-11-06T18:58:00.000-05:00

You better get out and vote

If anyone needs further proof that the band of idiotic thugs running this country has gone over the deep end, they should check out this propaganda piece that aired this past weekend on (where else) Fox News.

These sick sick fuckers actually submitted themselves to waterboarding in an attempt to show the American public how "efficient" harmless it really is. The message these sub-human cretins want to convey before we go to the polls? Hey, this isn't really torture. This guy was back to normal in an instant. What's the problem with doing THIS to terrorists?

We have now officially become a nation that

1. Sanctions torture

and more importantly

2. Endorses torture on a major news network in an effort to propagandize for a political party.

You tell ME how we're any better from some third world banana republic. How we're so much better than Kim Jong Il, whose regime has relentlessly propagandized his people for over 50 years to the point where they feel anything "Dear Leader" does is A-OK as well.

This is no longer a vote on whether the Republican party should govern. Anyone with eyes to see can see they are inept at even the most simple of governance functions. No, this is about regaining our soul as a people. Do we want to live in a country that sanctions torture and broadcasts the benefits of it on TV, or do we want a return to sanity?

Your choice America, get out and vote on Tuesday.

2006-11-04T14:34:00.000-05:00

How the fuck did he do that?

November 7th isn't going to JUST be the day that this country decides whether or not it will continue down the road to fascism or step back from the brink, its also the day that Guitar Hero II comes out.

Check out the guy who sold his soul to Nintendo Satan play "Freebird" on expert level. He's my new hero:

2006-11-02T22:43:00.000-05:00

Well this certainly explains a lot

I'm not sure whether to feel anger, disgust or pity when I read that one of the leading lights of the evangelical movement has been caught red handed paying for gay sex.

On the one hand, it certainly explains their obsession with gay sex. I mean they clearly have it on their minds constantly, certainly more than I do. I guess its because they have to sneak it on the side.

Mostly I guess I'm just sad at how people like this have used religion to foster hatred and misunderstanding. Haggard is the same jackass that taught his flock that "free markets" are a central tenent of the gospel. Religious people being what they are, they believe what they're told by authority figures. Fast forward a few years and we find ourselves in our current situation.

Here's hoping they either open their eyes or stay home on Tuesday. As Andrew Sullivan has been fond of saying recently, this isn't an election anymore its an intervention.

2006-10-21T09:52:00.000-04:00

Excuse me, your desperation is showing

One would be hard pressed to single out any one particularly pathetic response to the whole Mark Foley debacle that erupted recently. I mean, we had Newt Gingrich going on TV to peddle the idea that Republicans wanted to avoid being accused as gay bashers, which is why they let Foley run wild for so many years chasing gorgeous underaged youths.

I realize that we generally have short memories in this country, but surely everyone is going to remember that these people have been demonizing gays every election cycle since the 2000 coup d'etat. All of a sudden Newt Gingrich has a sense of propriety and a new found respect for gay people?

Forgive me, but I'm not buying it.

But sadder by far is this post by a Log Cabin Republican that attempts to portray the Republican party as the last bastion of gay rights in this country.

I'm not sure how in love with your portfolio gains and home equity appreciation values you would have to be to try and present this argument. What more does the right wing have to do to the gay community before these idiots get it?

In the past I've always been kind of tolerant of gay conservatives. I mean they're kind of amusing to have at parties, in the same way that inviting the Dungeons and Dragons club to the high school kegger to spout THEIR idiocy was sort of amusing. But this is honestly too much. I'd prefer people like this deal with their parent and closet issues with a therapist rather than propose desperate ideas like this one.

2006-10-19T18:41:00.000-04:00

Auntie Dion, we ain't you WARN a bitch?

I finally got home at a decent hour tonight and heard the terrible news. Apparently Whitney has split from Bobby.

Didn't she almost have it all? Great looks and a talent that appealed to the mediocre middle that seems to scraf up Rod Stewart and Michael Bolton cd's by the caseful. Then she met Bobby Brown and the crack pipe. She was far more entertaining as a crack head in my opinion, but you couldn't help but be a LITTLE sad about her plunge into the basement.

Auntie Dion, you have all these psychic friends, why ain't you ever warn a bitch?!

Hopefully this move signals she's trying to clean up her act a bit. I'll always remember Whitney filtered through the lens of Mad TV though.

2006-10-15T21:16:00.000-04:00

Tales from the trenches

Well I just put in two weekend days at my new client down in beautiful downtown Wilmington DE. I've logged in almost 70 hours the past six days and frankly my head is spinning. Some quick observations before I watch the final episode of Flavor of Love and then go to bed to start back up again

1. I definitely AM qualified to be a consultant. As the saying goes, 90% of success is showing up. You basically put in the hours, empathize with the client and jump in when you see something that you think you can handle. The client likes me, looks like my new career is off to a good start.

2. Wilmington is a major shithole. Nowhere to go out to lunch. Nowhere to park. The homeless population seems to like it as well. The eeriest part? Walking around downtown and seeing no people. Why does this city exist?

Anyway, things are going to settle down on Wednesday when I hope to post about something other than this damn new job. Unfortunately I've been disconnected from life for the past three weeks, so I'm not really sure how much I have to say right now.

One fun update - I did get tickets to see Primus Nov 10 at the Tower Theater. I'm looking forward to a full blown freakout.

2006-10-07T10:09:00.000-04:00

What was the fuss all about?

Well I've finally calmed the fuck down about my new job. Last week I was a wreck worrying about being worthy of the new position and frankly wasn't good for going to the gym, writing on this blog, or even looking in the mirror.

Consultant?! Who in the hell is going to pay ME to "consult". My God, they're billing me out to clients at THAT rate?! I am SO not worth that! Oh my God, my first client is a UTILITY?!! I've never worked at a utility, I am SO going to choke.

Turns out the client is a peach. Everything I've been given I know how to handle. Perhaps I am worthy of the significant bump in salary I received. Hell, yesterday I think I even brought our firm MORE business by suggesting that our firm could assist with an imminent FAS 123 matter (don't ask).

So all in all I'm starting to feel confident again. I'm going to go to a Gryphons scrimmage today at noon and then I plan on coming back and doing a weekend Wiki.

Look for more frequent blog posting going forward now that I've gotten my proverbial shit together

2006-09-30T09:39:00.000-04:00

This shit is funny yo

Angry Little Tank started his new job as a consultant this week. For the obvious reasons my mind wasn't on my blog. Posting may be a little infrequent for a while as my first client is going to require crazy hours for the next six weeks or so.

Look for a more detailed post on my new gig soon, but in the meantime check this out. I can't decide if I find his idiotic behavior or the fact that he has "Eye of the Tiger" playing in the background more hilarious. Enjoy.

2006-09-23T12:32:00.000-04:00

Quote for the day

I don't know what the CIA has been doing, nor should I know

Senator Jeff Sessions from Alabama.

Is there a better statement that sums up how utterly worthless our congressional branch has become?

2006-09-22T09:14:00.000-04:00

The Friday Wiki - I don't think that word means what you THINK it means edition

I know I may be getting some hate mail for saying this, but I've officially soured on America. We are on the verge of officially sanctioning torture in a move which the mainstream media is breathlessly describing as a compromise and a bold stroke for bipartisanship.

Wikipedia defines bipartisanship as:

any bill ,act ,resolution , or any other action of a political body in which both of the major political parties are in agreement

So there you have it folks, the White House and John McCain (where are the Democrats in all of this?) are in agreement that the United States may now torture. That's what "bipartisanship" has become. An agreement between an insane and outlaw whitehouse and their same party enablers in Congress who want to assume the power in two years. Let's take a look at this compromise shall we?

According to the New York Times:

The three rebel senators achieved only modest improvements on the White House's original positions. They wanted to bar evidence obtained through coercion. Now, they have agreed to allow it if a judge finds it reliable (which coerced evidence hardly can be) and relevant to guilt or innocence . The way coercion is measured in the bill, even those protections would not apply to the prisoners at Guantánamo Bay.

The deal does next to nothing to stop the president from reinterpreting the Geneva Conventions . While the White House agreed to a list of "grave breaches"of the conventions that could be prosecuted as war crimes, it stipulated that the president could decide on his own what actions might be a lesser breach of the Geneva Conventions and what interrogation techniques he considered permissible . It's not clear how much the public will ultimately learn about those decisions. They will be contained in an executive order that is supposed to be made public, but Mr. Hadley reiterated that specific interrogation techniques will remain secret

That's some great compromise guys. You've basically allowed the White House to say that sure, some torture techniques are out of bounds, but then allowed them to add language to the bill that says the president may decide what's out of bounds or what isn't. Outstanding job guys.

At the very least I hope that this will kill the idea that McCain is any sort of "maverick". He's as much of lickspittle beholden to this outlaw White House as any of the other worthless cretins in Washington. Now that they have their odious legislation, watch Rove and co. proceed to bash the Democrats with it in the upcoming election season.

I can see now that we're doomed as a nation. This is the first step towards a Soviet style dictatorship where dissidents are disappeared and tortured. Its clear we'll tolerate any breach against our freedoms and our morals as long as the spectre of terrorism is invoked. We're running around like scared little pisspants over a handful of religious fanatics living in caves. How pathetic.

Nothing is going to stop these maniacs now. But hey at least we've achieved "compromise" and "bipartisanship" even if it means we've sold whatever was left of our soul to do it. Heaven forbid we create a disturbance or question anything that comes out of Bush's mouth.

2006-09-17T16:00:00.000-04:00

Roger Waters at the Tweeter Center - Which One's Pink?

I've been a Pink Floyd fan since I was 15 years old, so when I heard that Roger Waters was coming to the Tweeter Center AND would be performing the seminal Pink Floyd album Dark Side of the Moon I knew I had to go.

The show sold out in like a nanosecond, which kind of took me by surprise. I guess after selling 35 million copies, there are a few people out there who would like to see Dark Side performed live. A quick ebay auction landed us two tickets for only $15 over face value on the lawn. Could have been worse. Our friend Bob scored a lawn ticket of his own on the ferry over to Camden and we were good to go.

The first thing I noticed was the crowd. I think the charitable term one could use would be "scumbag". Drunk and high was a given, but they all looked used somehow as well. Every 10 seconds it seemed as though some moron was slurring at the top of his lungs "E-A-G-L-E-S....EAGLES!!!!" while hundreds of his idiotic brethren joined in. Philadelphia sports fans have a reputatin for being obnoxious, I assure you this is well earned.

We got into the venue shortly after 8pm and made our way towards the back of the lawn. A short while later the show started. The opener was "In The Flesh" from The Wall. The sound was a little thin way back on the lawn, but the band was certainly tight and well rehearsed. I was relieved that the guitarist they chose for most of the leads was competant. Few can emote on a Fender the way Dave Gilmour can, but this guy did an admirable job.

My favorite track from The Wall came up next - "Mother". Roger traded vocals with one of the backup singers he had brought, which added a layer of soul to an otherwise emotionally vacant song. It was very nicely done.

After that the evening started getting a little psychedelic as we "Set The Controls For The Heart Of The Sun". I love all the songs from "Live at Pompeii" so I got into it right away. The middle improv segment was very trippy with accompanying visuals on the screens. It was enough to make one nostalgic for those college era acid days.

The only complaint I had was that the crowd was starting to get restless and talked loudly throughout the rest of the first set. Some douchebag in front of us started going into detail about the construction business he was getting off the ground. The kind of truck he needed to buy. What an asshole the last client was. How tight money is right now. WHO CARES, SHUT THE FUCK UP!

Three songs from "Wish You Were Here" came up next - "Shine On You Crazy Diamond", "Have A Cigar", and "Wish You Were Here". Roger played acoustic guitar for this segment, which was interesting to see. The music was well played but at this point I was starting to realize that seeing this music peformed live just wasn't the same without the full band. It was good, but not great.

I was particularly annoyed by the drummer. Where Nick Mason deftly tapped out complex rythyms, this jackass would pound on them like a sledgehammer. It effected the emotional impact of all the music, dumbing it down essentially.

But why dwell on the negative? A couple of tracks off "The Final Cut", which I consider to be highly under-rated, came next - "Southhampton Dock" and "The Fletcher Memorial Home". Both contain overt anti-war messages and surprisingly the crowd seemed receptive. I had heard stories of certain songs being booed in other cities. As if Pink Floyd hadn't been singing about the futility of war since the very beginning. The Philly Billies were responsive though, maybe they realize that they would be the ones asked to make the sacrifices if we continue on our never ending path of war we're on.

A couple of selections from the solo catalogue came next. They were good, but nothing that great. The first set ended with "Sheep" from "Animals". A huge inflatible graffitied pig was released off the lawn during the climax to the song. It was cheesey, but a nice reminder of the 1978 tour. I'm still angry at my parents for not having the foresight to take me to that show when I was eight. LOL!

During the quick set break I had to go the bathroom. What a horror show. People lined up to piss in the sink. Eagles chants quickly followed by "New York sucks!" (I mean it does, but who cares?) followed by "TO sucks" (again, he does but can we just piss and get out of here?).

I shook that off, grabbed a quick beer and then headed upstairs back to the lawn just as the heartbeat drumming of "Dark Side" was beginning. Everybody probably already knows the setlist so I won't go into great detail. I'll just say that it was 40 minutes of bliss. You just never get tired of hearing those songs and watching them performed live by one of the men responsible was a real treat. Even the crowd quieted down for the most part and watched it all unfold. Once again, the backup singers were top notch with "Great Gig In The Sky" being the obvious standout.

The encores were "Another Brick In The Wall pt. II", (with nice crowd participation during the child chorus) "Vera Lynn", "Bring The Boys Back Home" (both greeted with loud cheers, if you've lost these people on your war you're screwed George. Check out the video included below for a taste) and finally "Comfortably Numb". Unfortunately for some reason they decided to trade off solos between a second guitarist for this song, who just wasn't that great. It kind of killed the experience for me.

Still and all, a great show and a memorable experience. Not quite the visual feast you got from either the 1987 or 1994 post-Waters Pink Floyd shows, but a great evening of great music. My guess is this will be the last time we see any live Floyd in these parts and I was happy I was able to go.

2006-09-15T13:29:00.000-04:00

The Friday Wiki - I can't believe I have to write this edition

Is anybody else extremely disturbed that their tax dollars are being used to fund things such as water boarding? Whatever your thoughts are on the legitimacy of the "war on terror", is our anger as a nation really so embedded at this point that we'll cross the ethical line into torture?

Incredibly, it seems that is exactly the case. Bush is
putting the screws to Congress to pass legislation that would allow the CIA to perform "coercive techniques" when interrogating suspected terrorists.

Forget the well accepted fact that torture rarely produces any actionable intelligence. Forget the fact that in our 225+ years we have always prided ourselves as being governed by an ethical rule of law that abandoned torture as part of the old world.

The fact is we signed The Geneva Conventions and we are bound by law to follow them. PERIOD. With the prospect of a Democratic Congress looming in 60 days, Bush is busting his ass to retroactively make his illegal activities legal before somebody who MAY hold him accountable hits town.

For the record , Article III of the Geneva Convetions states quite plainly:

...That Persons taking no active part in the hostilities, including POWs; shall in all circumstances be treated humanely

Take a good look at the guy in this photo. He was later released and determined to be unaffiliated with any terrorist organization. Your taxes dollars helped pay for that.

We're rapidly allowing our fear to redefine us as a nation, and what we're becoming is ugly. I urge everyone to vote in November and to get some perspective on who we are becoming.

Before its too late.

2006-09-14T09:34:00.000-04:00

Wow the 90's sucked

Ever since early August I've been tuning in to my XM Radio to listen to something called It. The idea is to basically play every single song that hit the charts from 1940 through 2006.

We're finally up to 1992 and one thing I've noticed is that music in the 1990's was weak. Everything sounds the same. You can break everything down into either hair metal (Guns n' Roses, Skid Row, etc.), generic ballads sung by black women (Whitney, Vanessa Williams, Toni Braxton, etc.), or generic hip hop (Bell Biv Devoe, Tony Toni Tone, etc.)

What a bunch of absolute shite. I blame 40 something baby boomers recently out of rehab after their 80's coke binge for buying this crap. Who else but some burned out 40 year old soccer mom would think Celine Dion was worth the time of day?

I was in college at this time and I remember drifting from my angry thrash phase (Slayer, Metallica, etc.) to listening solely to the college radio station after hitting Florida State. Nirvana, Screaming Trees, Soundgarden, Pearl Jam? I was seeing those guys for free at the pizza joint in the student quad, based solely on what I was hearing on my radio while delivering pizzas around town.

There was good music being made, but it sure as hell wasn't on the charts.

Bottom line? Manufactured corporate music will always suck.

Update: I just heard "Have I Told You Lately" by Rod Stewart. Fuck you too 1993!

2006-09-11T20:38:00.000-04:00

In Memorium

I told myself I would avoid any maudlin sentimentality today. It seems like everybody with a blog out there has written exhaustively today about what occurred 5 years ago and how we've been lied to and exploited since then. What more could I add?

But I'd be remiss if I didn't link to this post I found on the Daily Kos concerning all of the gay Americans that died that day. Unlike everyone else who died, their stories were usually buried or sanitized. Nobody really talked about who gay partners were ineligible for death benefits. Nobody mentioned that the Catholic priest who died while administering last rites was gay.

Even sadder, partners of closeted police and firefighters had to mourn in secret. They would not have been welcome at any of the public memorials to honor their immense loss.

All of us had to suffer indignities such as the Christian Right telling us

I really believe that the pagans and the abortionists and the feminists and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People for the American Way, all of them who try to secularize America...I point the thing in their face and say you helped this happen."

We're stronger and tougher than any of these "people" will ever realize. We suffered these indignities and more while mourning along with everyone else.

But now we're moving on. We'll get our rights one day and we'll make sure that this kind of reprehensible scapegoating in the face of a national tragedy never occurs again.

2006-09-10T18:08:00.000-04:00

The Weekend Wiki

Getting back into this whole blogging thing, or indeed life in general, has been difficult since coming back from vacation. Throw in the first rugby weekend of the fall season and all of the inherent craziness something like that brings and you see my dilema

Of course the biggest news this past week has been that I FINALLY landed a new job. I'm going to try consulting for a while. The money seems great and the home office is located here in center city Philadelphia, which is way better than the hike out to Horsham. I found myself bored and unstimulated doing "risk management". I think this will be great.

One thing that definitely helped me land this job was my recent designation as a Certified Public Accountant (CPA). What the hell do CPA's do anyway? How do you become one?

Well first off, you have to pass a really difficult exam. It took me a year of studying and testing to pass the exam, and that is actually pretty fast. I've heard stories of people taking four years to pass all four parts of the exam. You're generally tested on Financial Statement preparation, Auditing, Business Law, Tax and Ethics (don't laugh, we're at least SUPPOSED to have some).

Once the exam is passed you're still not a CPA unfortunately, you need to meet certain work experience requirements. In almost all states this would be attestation experience, which basically means that you look at other people's financial statements and say that you agree with them. You test the internal controls, test certain transactions to confirm balances and put in long hours.

I did my attestation work doing internal audit, which is a little different than an external audit. You're supposed to be independant, but I never felt like we were doing anything meaningful to be honest with you. It all depends on which company you work for I guess, and I worked for one that definitely did NOT take financial statement controls seriously.

Many CPA's get into consulting because the money is just too good and you can ditch the monotany of the monthly/annual financial statement preparation process you get in corporations. Firms bill clients huge sums of money for the knowledge you (ostensibly) gain while attaining your CPA status.

All I know is that I'm looking forward to doing some meaningful work again and beginning to make some real money. I'm in my mid 30's and frankly I'm tired of doing low level number crunching for mediocre pay in cubicle hell.

Look for more active blogging going forward!

2006-08-25T08:42:00.000-04:00

The Friday Wiki - Homecoming Edition

Angry Little Tank is taking a break for the next 10 days as I go on vacation. My itinerary this year is five days visiting family in beautiful downtown Melbourne Florida followed by the obligatory four day trip to Provincetown Mass.

My mother moved us to Florida in 1986 after a particularly nasty divorce in Pittsburgh. She loaded up the VW Rabbit with her three kids and drove the 20 hours down to Melbourne in August of 1986. The first thing you notice? Florida is really really hot.

Ever since then, whenever I tell people here in the blue state world that I moved to the northeast from Melbourne I always get "where is that?". Well listen up people because here is all you'll ever need to know about the sleepy little community known as Melbourne Florida. You may want to get a strong caffeinated beverage before you begin.

As you can see by the little red dot on the attached map, Melbourne is located on the east coast of Florida right below Cape Canaveral. The 70 miles of beaches we have in Brevard County is collectively known as the "Space Coast". A cute enough reference to the nearby dying space industry, until you've been jarred awake at 4am by a shuttle launch sonic boom rattling every window in your home. And for some reason shuttles are launched at 4am A LOT.

Melbourne is a town of about 75,000 people who enjoy these beaches. In fact there's not much else to enjoy in Melbourne besides these really kick ass beaches. I used to run on the beach in high school when I was on the cross country team. We'd drive out to the beach at night to hang out. We all had incredibly deep tans year round.

That's about the only positive thing I can tell you about Melbourne unfortunately. Most of the people who live there are either rednecks or retired military people from nearby Patrick Air Force Base. It makes for a very cranky and ignorant populace.

We have a mall and a movie theater. There is one nightclub that thinks it's still 1986 and that people in Melbourne want to feel like they're on the set of Miami Vice. I remember karaoke bars being overly prevalent. As in every single place you went had a thin mulleted little ratfaced dude wailing away drunk on some tortured hair metal rocker. I distinctly remember walking in quite stoned to a bar one mile from our house while home from college one year to the shrill greeting of a 250 pound man with his shirt off on the bar with a microphone asking me "YOU KNOW WHERE YOU ARE? YOU'RE IN THE JUNGLE BABY! YOU'RE GONNA DIIIIIEEEEE!!!"

I fled the scene immediately.

The cops seemed pretty bored too. I remember having my bicycle in the back of my truck (yes I drove a pickup truck, I went native sue me) and running into 7-11 one night. When I came out a cop was writing down my license plate into a pad. "Where did you get this bike?" Uhhh...its my bike. "Can you prove it?" Uhhh..no and I don't have to..I'm driving home now. "I'm watching you tough guy". Whatever, goodnight Enus!

Still despite all this, I AM kind of looking forward to going home. Since successfully pulling off my escape in 1994 I haven't been back to Melbourne and frankly I'm curious to see it again. Its always good to catch up with Mom and my brother just had a new baby.

But at the end of five days I'm getting the hell out of there to party my ass off in P-town. Til then!

2006-08-23T09:55:00.000-04:00

State of Mind

I turn 36 years old today. Wow it feels kind of weird to even type that. Closer to 40 than 30. Certainly middle-aged. Yikes.

Still, I'm in a much better place with my aging than I was last year at this time. 35 just seemed like the end of the known universe at the time. Its hard to describe the feeling of dread I carried with me for weeks after my birthday. Like at any moment I was going to be stricken with cancer after being forced to give up my Playstation. Sci-fi movies would be replaced with French existential cinema. Friday nights drinking would be replaced by warm glasses of milk and 9pm bedtimes.

Of course none of that has happened. The only real tangible effects of my age I've seen so far has been my rapid exit from the world of rugby due to a torn ACL. I've decided to deal with it by overcompensating at the gym, which has the added benefit of making me look like a 25 year old.

So here's to another year. I'm going to concentrate on worrying less, quitting smoking more, and trying to have as much fun as I can before 40 (when the world certainly will end).

Its going to be great, I can tell.

2006-08-19T14:16:00.000-04:00

Holy Shit!

In a rare moment of corporate obeisance, I'm going to demand that everyone who owns a car go immediately to the Geico website and get a rate quote. I just saved myself close to $1,700 a year on auto insurance.

GMAC Insurance, you're dead to me. Geico, I am your willing slave.

2006-08-18T11:41:00.000-04:00

The Friday Wiki - its all around you

So yeah...how fucked up is this country right now? I mean gas is $3.50 a gallon, we're caught in a never-ending war, religious fundamentalism is on the rise, the economy is heading south, and thousands of terrorists are plotting ways to turn ordinary household chemicals into bombs you can sneak onto planes.

Our press has failed us by long ago abdicating their responsiblity to bring truth to the masses in favor of currying favor with their corporate overlords by towing the corporatist Republican line.

There's got to be one word that could describe our descent into mindless idiocy. What got us to this point?

One word which certainly fits is hubris. Exaggerated self confidence. Reckless disregard. As an added bonus, the Greeks (who invented the term) regard a hubristic act as causing particular shame for the victim of your reckless disregard.

Sound familiar?

2006-08-16T11:48:00.000-04:00

"They don't have TV in rehab"

Dennis Leary sings the praises of the Red Sox first baseman, who just happens to be Jewish. I think you know where this is going....

2006-08-13T21:01:00.000-04:00

The Weekend Wiki - fall rugby season kickoff edition

In honor of the kickoff of fall practice this past week of my team, the Philly Gryphons, I decided to do a quick post on the origins and rules of rugby.

And yes, I know this is two days late.

First some basics. You can only pass backwards in rugby. This ensures that the only way to move the ball forward up the field is either by running with it or kicking it. Union league play consists of 15 people on each side. There is also something called "league" play with slightly different rules and 13 people on each side. There is also something called sevens, but let's not go there.

The rules themselves are far too arcane to go into via a blog entry, especially in light of the link provided. Suffice it to say that most are ignored by the players and missed by the ref during an 80 minute battle between 30 men.

With my torn ACL still needing repair (I'm holding off gettng it fixed until I figure out what's going on with my job search), its starting to sink into my skull that I probably won't be playing again anytime soon. Its a damn shame too. I never really "got" team sports growing up and for the first time really felt like I was part of something special during a sporting event. Not to mention, playing totally butched up my image.

If you live in the Philly area and you're interested in learning more about the game or possibly participating I encourage you to check out the Gryphons (my old team, link provided above). You'll have a blast.

2006-08-09T06:56:00.000-04:00

Great day for democracy

Its a great day when Democrats in a deep blue state like Connecticut can bounce a total creep like Lieberman off the Democratic primary ticket after 18 years of incumbancy. This guy was to the right of many REPUBLICANS in insisting that the president cannot be criticized in times of war.

Hell I could spend the next hour listing all the really obnoxious and borderline fascist things this ass has done. Instead I'm going to shave, get ready for work and enjoy this. You should too!

2006-08-08T13:03:00.000-04:00

Oh the humanity - enough already!!!

I think its high time somebody with a modicum of sense and taste declare a jihad against any late middle-aged actor trying to relive his glory years by putting out unwanted sequels to hits from their heyday.

Who told Bruce Willis we needed Die Hard 4.0? It sure as hell wasn't me. I mean I kind of enjoyed the first one....20 YEARS AGO, but I wasn't exactly scratching my head wondering when we were going to get another.

Of course those of us who live in Philadelphia have been aware since LAST summer that we were getting a Rocky 6. Say that to yourself out loud and let it sink in. Rocky. SIX. Apparently even one with a diminished brainpan such as Stallone realized that wouldn't work so its being called
Rocky Balboa. Incredibly he's actually going to fight in it, not just coach as he did in Rocky 5 (you know, the shit sandwich he gave us back in 1990). Ten thousand points if you knock out his dentures!

Aside from being completely unnecessary, these movies are coming in really late after their previous franchise entry. I mean, I thought we'd seen the last of Indiana Jones in 1989, but damned if they're not hauling out Indiana Jones 4. And get this, Sean Connery is going to be in it too! Have you seen either Harrison Ford or Sean Connery lately? They look as though they look as though they're ready to have their colostomy bags changed, not swinging over bottomless chasms with a whip as blood thirsty Nazis intent on regaining ancient Egyptian artifacts (or whatever) are on your heels. I hope 20th Century Fox is current on their insurance.

The saddest of all pending sequels for a sci-fi geek like me has got to be a third installment in John Carpenter's Snake Pliskin movies, which is going to be called Escape From Earth. Escape From New York was way ahead of its time. It had everything. A post-apocalyptic sci-fi universe in which the entire island of Manhattan has been turned into a penal colony. And get this - the president's plane just crashed into it. WHOOO HOOOO!!!!! DAMN that was a fun two hours.

Then we got Escape from LA like 10 years ago. Ouch. Talk about a downer. I just sat in the theater wishing I had taken that extra bong hit that was offered wondering "Did I just see Kurt Russel surfboarding down Rodeo Drive?".

Give it a rest guys. You're just diluting whatever juice these movies had back in their day by putting out weak sauce sequels. Yes I'm sure you're getting paid, but however much it is its not worth it.

And oh yeah, after last week's incident in Melibu we may be subjected to a Lethal Weapon 5 now too. Another reason to hate Gibson.

On the upside, maybe he'll call somebody "sugar tits" in it......

2006-08-03T20:21:00.000-04:00

The Friday Wiki - What's an auto da fe?

Its what you oughtn't to do but you do anyway!

Oh the genius of Mel Brooks. I particularly liked contrasting his most Jewish method of laughing in the face of persecution against the other Mel earlier this week. The crazy ass Jew hating Mel. Part of doing that was linking to this great segment from History of the World part 1. But what does "auto da fe" mean? What are its origins?

An auto da fe was a ritual of public punishment for convicted heretics (read Muslims and Jews) that occurred during the Middle Ages. The term in Spanish means "act of faith". Jews and Muslims were herded into the public square (after a Catholic mass naturally) and tortured for public amusement. Executions often followed.

If the Mel Gibsons and Osama bin Ladens of the world get their way the Jews and gays will be subject to this and far worse. Never forget that or dismiss this just as crazy people doing crazy things.

But feel free to laugh at such injustice as often as you can. You just gotta.

2006-08-01T08:32:00.000-04:00

Mel Gibson is a Jew hating whack job

Well it finally happened, Mel Gibson managed to get himself arrested for DUI last Friday morning in Malibu and let loose on the arresting officers about his deep abiding hatred of the Jews.

How drunk was he? Not very as it turned out, just .12 blood alcohol level. The equivalent of three or four beers. Enough to loosen social inhibitions and turn batshit crazy loons into raving psychopaths.

Those of us who weren't enraptured by blood soaked pornography two years ago certainly recognized that this guy had a deep abiding anti-Semitic streak in him. The way his film protrayed the Jews could have been culled from a Torquemada tirade in Spain during the middle ages.

Of course the Christianists swooned at having a film about Christ given the Hollywood treatment replete with buckets and buckets of blood. Having had their two most virulent urges satisfied in one film (bloodlust and shoving their faith down everyone's throat) they weren't about to allow their new icon to be tained by the whiff of anti-Semitism.

Idiots like this one and this one insisted most emphatically that Mel was not anti-Semitic. Hell if anything, the BIBLE was anti-Semitic, but certainly not Mel.

Do these people EVER get tired of being wrong? About every. single. fucking. thing?

That film was utter trash. A violent pornographic horror film that self-righteously wrapped itself up in a Christian bow and presented itself to the unwashed hordes as some sort of antitode to "secularism". The man who made it has always had a torture fetish that he loves to protray on film and whether the automatons who lined up to see it want to admit it or not, they got off on watching a man tortured for two hours. Probably almost as much as Mel did when he made the movie.

As an added bonus, all the deep seated yet carefully subterfuged hatred this same crowd has for the Jewish people was quietly re-affirmed.

As such, I don't think Mel's little "incident" will slow his career down that much. It will hopefully relegate it to the fringes where it belongs however. Those of us in decent society got rid of this way of thinking about 500 years ago.

2006-07-30T19:51:00.000-04:00

The Weekend Wiki

Okay I got lazy this weekend and haven't posted the Friday Wiki. This week in honor of my very own heightened testosterone levels we'll be taking a look at the Tour de France. Who the hell thought it would be a good idea to have a 30 day bike race in France?

The Tour de France was conceived of as a publicity stunt for the French newspaper L'Auto, who announced the first race on January 19, 1903. The stunt worked as sales of the paper soared in the years following the first race.

Originally conceived as a race solely for individuals with way too much time on their hands, the race is now comprised of professional teams backed by corporate sponsors. The race course changes yearly alternating between a clockwise and counter-clockwise tours of the country. The segments of the race that go through the Alps are always fan favorites apparently.

Floyd Landis continued the recent trend of American dominance in this event, but controversy has surrounded his testing positive for "heightened levels of testosterone". Who knows what that means, but one thing is for certain. This event is way more competitive than it was initially envisioned.

2006-07-26T13:38:00.000-04:00

Time for a new tactic

Well it looks as though another challenge to a gay marriage ban was shot down this morning in Washington State.

Unsurprisingly, the argument was similar to a recent decision made in New York state. Namely that the purpose of marriage is to promote procreation and provide homes for children. Since gay marriage doesn't do that, gays have no right to marriage.

I'm tired of begging the legislatures to give me my rights in the form of pathetic petitions or protests. I'm definitely through looking to the courts to enforce equal protection under the law. We need to come up with different tactics, ones that will show the world how contradictory and illogical these homophobic assholes are.

Here's an excerpt from today's majority opinion:

DOMA is constitutional because the legislature was entitled to believe that limiting marriage to opposite-sex couples furthers procreation, essential to survival of the human race, and furthers the well-being of children by encouraging families where children are reared in homes headed by the children’s biological parents. Allowing same-sex couples to marry does not, in the legislature’s view, further these purposes.

So by this logic, marriage is solely for procreation. In addition, the opinion states children raised in homes headed by the the child's biological parents is the ideal.

We need to start pushing for laws that make marriage between infertile couples illegal. I plan on posting details on how we can start to make this happen here in PA in the next few weeks, but if anybody from states like CA that allow ballot initiatives easily you need to get on that ASAP. Those 30 somethings who just aren't able to conceive a kid? Guess what, your marriage is worthless. Divorce immediately and look for different partners. Marriage is for procreation only, any other definition is unconstitutional.

Any lawyers out there? Contact me I'd love to lend energy to a lawsuit here in Pennsylvania.

I also think we should push to make divorce illegal. If children should only be raised in homes with two biological parents, why are divorces so easy to procure? Let these assholes remain trapped in loveless or abusive marriages for a while, we'll see how their view on marriage shifts.

Let's stop begging for our rights and start taking theirs using their own illogical arguments against them. I'm tired of this shit, aren't YOU?

2006-07-21T11:09:00.000-04:00

The Friday Wiki - Petarded

One of my favorite scenes from Family Guy deals with Stewie interacting with his teddy bear Rupert in the family living room. He tells Rupert "No, seriously Rupert gullible isn't in the dictionary, if you don't believe me just look it up!". After handing the inanimate stuffed animal a dictionary he then exclaims "What's that you say? Its NOT in the dictionary? Let me see that!"

He then flashes a sly grin and congratulations Rupert on a prank well played. "Oh Rupert, TOUCHE! Hoisted by my own petard" He then goes on to lament "I am SO alone"

Aside from being a hilarious scene that works on so many levels (I mean how many of us haven't felt isolated by our own genius) it brings us to a rather obscure saying. What is a petard? How can you be hoisted by it?

A petard was a medieval term for bombs used to crash castle gates. In modern times we use the phrase "hoisted by my own petard" to mean "to be harmed by one's own plan to harm someone else". The french use the term petard to mean "fart". Essentially hoisting yourself by your own petard is to be lifted up by a bomb of your own making. Shakespeare famously used the phrase in Hamlet, which gives a rather disgusting idea some semblance of respectability I suppose.

Now you know....a million bonus points if you ever get to use it replete with Stewie accent after saying "touche". Sadly, I've done this several times to people who probably had no idea what I was talking about.

2006-07-19T11:45:00.000-04:00

In Memorium

Everyone should take a moment today to remember Mahmoud Asgari and Ayaz Marhoni. They were two teenage boys who were executed one year ago in Iran solely for being gay.

We rightfully wail away here at ALT about the current disturbing rise of fundamentalism in this country, and the right wing shills who pander to these dangerous people. Its worth noting that people in other places are far worse off.

Here's hoping we step back from the brink. All of us. Soon.

2006-07-18T11:42:00.000-04:00

Herr Gropenfuhrer

There have been many eye rolling cringe worthy moments these past five years.

There was the frightening footage of Bush scared witless in front of a roomful of kids on the morning of 9/11.

There was the jaw dropping arrogance of watching our President strut across an airline carrier playing dress up soldier while our media .swooned like a 13 year old girl with a crush.

Just last week we were treated to the spectacle of Bush spewing expletives with his mouth full.

But watching the president of the United States fondling the newly elected German chancellor while she winces and recoils has just shot to the top of the charts as my favorite.

2006-07-14T09:32:00.000-04:00

The Friday Wiki

In an effort to further enhance my edification, and inspired by the Science Friday posts on the Daily Kos, I present to you the Friday Wiki. It will be a quick and simple explanation of a random topic I’ve researched on Wikipedia.

And yes, links will be included.

This inaugural post will deal with The Saxons. Yes people it’s the “S” in WASP, but what are its origins? Most people have a vague idea that it means “English” and in a way they’re right, but in another way they’re way wrong. Read on.

The Saxons were a particularly ferocious and barbaric tribe from what we now call Germany. Yes, Germany. Around the 5th century A.D. the Saxons were part of a group of Germanic tribes that were either invading or generally just migrating to the Roman outpost of Brittania, what we would call modern day England. Other tribes that joined the Saxons in this admittedly confusing endeavor (I mean what was the attraction? Sorry England) were the Jutes, the Frisians, and the Angles.

The latter tribe joined forces with the Saxons to settle/invade/pillage most of the farmlands in southern England and became known as the Anglo-Saxons. The term “English” itself is a derivation of Anglo-Saxon. The existing Britons (of Roman origin) were driven to the area we now call Wales. Three main Anglo-Saxon regions were formed to the south, east and west being called Sussex, Essex and Wessex respectively.

So now you know the origins of the term Anglo-Saxon. You also know why the Welsh consider themselves the “true” British people and proudly call themselves Welsh rather than English. I don’t speak German but those who do say that the language is remarkably similar to English. This would certainly explain why.

Now you know

2006-07-10T21:38:00.000-04:00

Hell Hath No Fury

Thank Jeebus they didn't have this back in the day when I was pretending to be straight and treating my "girlfriends" so badly. I would have had my bullshit put on notice, like so many of these ladies are doing to their worthless ex-boyfriends.

The straight boys better watch with the cheating, lying and not putting in the cuddle time because the girls are online and will put your shit on blast and it will NOT be cute.

Look for the gay version: "Don't Date Him Boo!" soon.

2006-07-07T07:04:00.000-04:00

No, I am NOT entertained

Apparently Russel Crowe is still taking this straight thing as far as it will go. I'm willing to put up with it a few more years in order to help his career along. I mean that beating of a hotel clerk with a phone was a PR disaster (though hot).

She can't make you happy like I can Russ. I'll leave it there, I've said enough....

2006-07-05T21:12:00.000-04:00

Wehret den Anfängen

Everyone who has driven through the god-forsaken state of Delaware can attest to two things:

1. Its ugly, beach areas aside
2. The people who live there are pretty fucking stupid. Did you ever see the bible guy who holds a bible over his head all day in the August sun by the side of the road? You know, for when people want to pull over and listen to some lunatic spout insanity as a break from road fatigue.

But even I didn't think these people were capable of enacting a modern day pogrom. Yes it seems that one local community decided to push religion into every facet of public life. When two families, one Jewish, had the temerity to complain the town rose up at once, pitchforks in hand, to intimidate the Jews into moving elsewhere.

My favorite part? The heckling of a sixth grade school boy:

The complaint recounts a raucous crowd that applauded the board's opening prayer and then, when sixth-grader Alexander Dobrich stood up to read a statement, yelled at him "take your yarmulke off!" His statement, read by Samantha, confided "I feel bad when kids in my class call me Jew boy."

Even better is this little gem directed at one of the female members of the family getting ready to graduate high school:

The Dobriches have a litany of complaints about the school board’s alleged promotion of Christianity, including the claim that members of Bible Clubs were allowed to jump the queue for lunch. One reported incident appears particularly egregious, concerning Samantha Dobrich’s 2004 graduation:

She was the only Jewish student in her graduating class. The complaint relates that local pastor, Jerry Fike, in his invocation, followed requests for "our heavenly Father's" guidance for the graduates with:

I also pray for one specific student, that You be with her and guide her in the path that You have for her. And we ask all these things in Jesus' name.

The family has subsequently had to move out of "Slower Delaware" two hours north to Wilmington.

Is it okay to call these people fascists NOW? How much more evidence do you need that all societal norms of decent behavior are being thrown out the window and sacrificed to the gods of hatred and intolerance? How much longer will the stupid people be allowed to run roughshod over everything we've fought for these past 200+ years? How many Americans DIED in WWII to destroy this way of thinking whose memory is now being dishonored by shrieking troglodytes emboldened by their recent successes at demonizing gays and brown people.

Wake the fuck up people. Its not a question of CAN it happen here, its happening. Which side are YOU on?

2006-07-03T12:45:00.000-04:00

Gimme a break

Had a very nice afternoon on Saturday watching England play Portugal and then France upset Brazil. One thing I've noticed is that soccer players rival Cal State theater majors in their histrionics over perceived physical infractions.

Take this foul which pretty much cost England the match against Portugal. In my mind, Rooney stepping on this guy was an incidental accident in a fight for the ball. Then the histrionics start as Ronaldo from Portugal runs over to protest. He gets shoved and Rooney gets bounced. The wink at the end shows the world what a farce the whole thing was.

With all due respect, what a bunch of pussies. If this were rugby, that Portugal guy would have had his dick stomped twice more by his own team if Ronaldo tried any of that drama bullshit.

I'm now officially rooting for France. Just cuz I know nobody else outside of France will....

2006-06-29T21:48:00.000-04:00

Red Cards
Unless you've completely lived under a rock for the past three weeks or so, you're probably at least marginally aware that the World Cup has started. While we all had high hopes for the fifth (!) ranked US team, in fact we are already bumped out of compeitition after a fairly mediocre showing.

Being an adult and all, I figured I'd just accept the loss (again) and root for one of the other teams like Brazil. Or maybe the home team Germany.

Then you have the Republican Response. That is to say the hysterical sore loser response. Apparently the issue lies entirely in the sport itself, which these guys feel is somehow primitive because you can't use your hands like a good simian.

No, I'm not joking.

But hey, at least they didn't get TOO hysterical and claim the sport is un-American or anything as is their wont.

Wait - oooops

Our country has yet to succumb to the nihilism, existentialism, and anomie that have overtaken Europe. A game about nothing, in which scoring is purely incidental, holds scant interest for Americans who still believe the world makes sense, that life has a larger meaning and structure, that being is not an end in itself, being qua being.

What a bunch of jackass poseurs. For the record, I've decided to root for England.

2006-06-28T20:13:00.000-04:00

Almost there....
We're sloooowly getting there with the kitchen. We just need to finish the bar cabinet, finish painting and install the dishwasher. One last push this long holiday weekend and one major source of stress will be removed.

Wherever will I get my anger inspiration going forward?

2006-06-23T11:19:00.000-04:00

Player Haters

What is our Congress up to now you ask? They're trying to resolve a viable exit strategy that will benefit the Iraqi people the most and get our troops home as safely as possible. They're also working on increasing the standard of living for all Americans by focusing on intelligent programs that will increase job growth and purchasing power of our vital middle class.

On the side, many are addressing the inequalities that still exist for minorities in this country.

NAH just kidding, they're pandering to hysterical parents by bashing video games again. Man, that one's only slightly less predictable than gay marriage for these ass clowns.

At least Jon Stewart's got our back. By the way - I am TOTALLY a CMB

2006-06-22T09:37:00.000-04:00

I've gone....INSANE

There’s no other explanation for it. Clearly the reality I live in is so far removed from everyone else’s that the only rational explanation is that I’ve lost my sanity. Luckily, so far the realization of my insane existence is the only sign of paranoia that I’ve noticed. Why?! Have you noticed something else? Tell me what you mean!

I guess the feeling has been growing a while now. I mean every time you see the cable news you get bombarded with idiocy. But here’s the thing, the people ON the TV don’t seem to notice the idiocy. The bleach blond bimbo reading the news spouts the idiocy. The poor bastard being subjected to the idiocy responds to the questions, as if they’re not even idiotic. Maybe idiotic things like this actually MAKE SENSE to this guy. Then again, he’s always kind of seemed like an idiot himself.

Or maybe they’re not making sense because I’m….INSANE.

Well maybe that’s a bad example. I mean I don’t watch a lot of television outside of the Sci Fi channel and HBO. But then you read things. Things like this
defense of why we couldn’t take Zarqawi out in 2002 as I mentioned in an ALT post last week. Apparently this administration, the Bush administration mind you, didn’t want to take out Zarqawi because they were afraid they would be criticized for violating international law.

Because, you know, we are ALL ABOUT the international law.

Yes Daveed Gartenstein-Ross and Adam White at the Weekly Standard apparently believe that the Bush administration was actually concerned about hurting the diplomatic efforts that may have prevented war and that’s why we didn’t take out Zarqawi in the Northern Iraq NFZ when we had the chance. And here I thought the entire “diplomacy” effort was a farce to lend our illegal invasion a patina of respectability on the world stage. I distinctly remember being told that previous bombings to the Iraqi NFZ were "routine".

Clearly I believed this because I’m…..INSANE.

And oh yeah, the article goes on to state that we didn’t want to take out Zarqawi because we were afraid of civilian casualties. The fact that my head didn’t explode while reading that is further testament to my impaired mental state. I'm sure that 60,000 Iraqis are rolling in their graves though.

Reactions with day to day people in my life have only affirmed my isolation into madness. Our friend helping us out on our kitchen goes red faced ballistic when we talk to a plumber about getting our sink installed (because HE wanted to do it). My rugby team sees nothing wrong with waiting until the last possible minute to get ready for…well…EVERYTHING. My boss at work thinks its perfectly acceptable to have a CPA/MBA go through 300 word documents to spell check them (and yes he has an admin).

What do these people know that I don't? Possibly that I'm.....INSANE?

I’m going to continue to monitor the situation and self medicate. Lack of further blog posting would indicate that they’ve finally taken me away. I hope there’s no cable news wherever they take me.

Or waterboarding……

2006-06-19T19:54:00.000-04:00

Hey check this out....

Brian Bilbray, recent winner of convicted congressman Duke Cunningham's vacated seat out in California, apparently has managed to breed a brood that fit the Young Republican mold

Underage partying? Check
Aryan good looks? Check
Mind boggling stupidity? Oh you better believe it

2006-06-16T08:25:00.000-04:00

Was it all bullshit?

I've been thinking a lot lately about my business degrees. I have a BS in Accounting and an MBA. I got these degrees because frankly I thought they would make me money. Everything I was really interested in like music, philosophy, literature wouldn't really net me a job. Due to various family financial issues (*cough* Dad *cough* asshole!) I was pretty broke toward the end of my college career and frankly just wanted a job.

Of course in any business curriculum they teach you the ins and outs of how American style capitalism works.

Or do they?

I took all of the finance classes and read several business publications. I invest both my 401(k) and my stock portfolio with an eye towards steady sustainable growth and diversity.

I've made like $300 in 9 years.

Okay, I thought...maybe if I get an analyst from a large brokerage house to help me out that would help. Clearly investing wasn't my forte.

We've lost $300 in two years with this guy.

And then you take a look around at how businesses are being run (into the ground). General Motors mocked the Japanese car industry for introducing hybrids three years ago. They've lost like $2 billion so far this year. Great business sense guys, meanwhile you can't find a new Prius on a lot that hasn't been sold already to somebody with a 6 month waiting list.

Some jackass writes about how the world is "flat" and the next thing you know hundreds of people are getting laid off at my company and their jobs are transferred to India. Forget the productivity gap. Forget that the wage gap will be closed within a decade or less negating this investment, damnit we've read a book!

Ethics scandals, corruption, bloated CEO pay. I could go on, but hopefully you're getting my point. The business world in the US is not being run efficiently. Its currently set up to transfer as much wealth as possible to a select cadre of largely incompetant managers who care nothing about the community in which they reside or their employees.

Am I the only one that thinks our system of capitalism is in serious need of an overhaul? One thing is certain, the people in MBA programs today have no idea how little they will be prepared for what's waiting for them. We've become a nation of Daffy Ducks smashing everyone in our path to the ground with the mantra "Down! Down! Down! Mine! Mine! Mine!"

2006-06-11T09:48:00.000-04:00

The Memory Hole

Something bothered me about the recent triumphalism this past week about the killing of Zarqawi in Iraq. Not that he was dead mind you, the Nick Berg video in which Zarqawi participated was enough to merit him sub-human status worthy of the violent death he received.

No, it was this story from 2004 detailing how we had many chances to take out Zarqawi before the war began but chose not to. The most revealing quote?

“People were more obsessed with developing the coalition to overthrow Saddam than to execute the president’s policy of preemption against terrorists,” according to terrorism expert and former National Security Council member Roger Cressey

In other words, we were more interested in building the phony case for our bullshit war than in taking out a known terrorist who was later responsible for killing thousands.

I'm sorry, but if you still vote Republican you either can't or you won't read.

2006-06-10T11:43:00.000-04:00

Setting a new standard for mediocre

Hat tip to Andrew Sullivan for pointing out the financial disaster that is Mary Cheney's latest book. Sales are so low that the publisher basically paid the equivalent of $170 per book sold not including marketing costs (hey it costs money to make that mess look pretty and then haul it out on late night TV).

I guess the public just isn't interested in what a lesbian who cheers on her own demise has to say. Come to think of it, I have yet to meet a so called "Log Cabin" Republican that isn't a mess. Just last night the head of the Philly LCR was a sloppy drunk mess offering to blow the entire rugby team "for free" right there at a local bar. Classy.

Clearly these people are having major self respect issues. In the case of Ms. Cheney, I would prefer she deal with these issues with a therapist rather than subject us to her justifications in book form.

2006-06-06T11:32:00.000-04:00

What a profile in courage looks like

You want to know what real leadership looks like in the face of disgusting discrimination? Read this statement by Russ Feingold, Democratic Senator from Wisconsin:

The federal marriage amendment, which would write discrimination into the Constitution, is an obvious attempt to change the subject from topics that the Congress should be addressing to a hot button social issue intended to appeal to certain factions. On Wednesday, Senate Majority Leader Frist plans to hold a vote on this mean-spirited proposal. It has no chance of receiving the two-thirds majority required for constitutional amendments. The only thing bringing it up now will accomplish is to push Congress further away from the issues it should be addressing and engage the Senate of the United States in a shameful political ploy.

The last thing we should be doing right now is playing politics with the Constitution, or with the lives of gay and lesbian Americans, who see this proposal for what it is - discrimination, pure and simple. Gay and lesbian Americans are our friends, our family members, our neighbors, and our colleagues. They should not be used as pawns in a political exercise.

Backers of the proposal say they want to support marriage. But this debate is not about supporting marriage. Everyone agrees that good and strong marriages should be supported and celebrated. The debate in the Senate is also not about whether states should permit same sex marriage. I happen to believe that two adults who love each other and want to make a lifelong commitment to each other with all of the responsibilities that commitment entails should be able to do so. Others may disagree. But the Senate debate is about whether we should amend the Constitution of the United States to try to define marriage, and restrict, rather than expand, the rights of our citizens. The answer to that question has to be "no."

It's deeply disappointing to see the Senate consider this proposed constitutional amendment, and for such cynical reasons. But it's not enough to just shake our heads at what the Republicans are doing here. I applaud people in the online community for standing up and speaking out against this proposal. This attempt to pass this constitutional amendment isn't about values. It's an attempt to stir up prejudice and fear, but I think it's going to stir up something else - outrage at Republican leaders. The proposal itself is an outrage, and so is its consideration at the expense of so many other important issues, from health care to gasoline prices to Iraq.

A colleague of mine asked me if I was taking a lot of heat for announcing my support for the right of gays and lesbians to marry. And, frankly, the question doesn't surprise me because I suppose many of my colleagues might be wary of taking a strong stand on an issue meant to divide Americans. The Washington Post today called this "a tricky issue for Democrats" but it doesn't have to be. All Americans should stand up and say no to the federal marriage amendment, no to discrimination targeted at some of our finest citizens, and no to this narrow-minded attempt to score political points in an election year.

Thanks for the opportunity to pass on some of my thoughts on this issue. I look forward to reading your comments

A strong unequivocal statement letting the world know that this is hateful, cynical and a waste of time. Feingold is worth 100 Mary Cheneys, and he's STRAIGHT.

2006-06-05T18:07:00.000-04:00

Here we go again

Its not as if we haven't seen it coming, but once again the right wing cabal is gearing up to demonize gays in an effort to get out the rabid right vote.

Call me a pie eyed optimist, but something tells me this cynical political move won't work this time. These incompetant jackasses have mired us down in an unwinnable war, lost an American city to natural disaster, drove our debt up to unimaginable levels, and have generally run the country into the ground.

But hey, two guys making out really pisses you off right?

Its beyond pathetic, its downright hateful. One wonders what these people would do if they actually got this passed (and there's no chance in hell they ever will). Would we be required to wear yellow stars in public? Rounded into camps? Neutered? I mean you know they wouldn't just stop hating at that point right?

Here's hoping the American people have finally seen through these nutjobs and will return the country to some semblance of sanity in November.

And oh yeah, Mary Cheney where are you now you clueless bitch?

2006-06-01T19:45:00.000-04:00

Now this....

When I hurt my leg last November, I figured it was because of the lousy NYC pitches. I rested up over the holidays and went to the first spring practice not thinking much about my knee. Then it got thrown out of joint.

I went to a doctor. Or I should say, a physician's assistant at my doctor's office. He recommended therapy and an x-ray. The x-ray showed that indeed I had a knee, but the four weeks of therapy seemed to help. I went to a practice in late March in good spirits.

And you know what? I made it through the practice. It was the next practice that it popped out with a sound that made me want to puke. I sought out an orthopedist and arranged to have an MRI done. A week or so later they pointed out a torn miniscus. This is easy to fix, I was told. Most athletes (and in my mind I was going "oooh he called me an athelete") are back on the field in a week.

I scheduled an appointment today with the surgeon thinking I'd get this taken care of real quick before the July 4th weekend. Well the surgeon looks at the MRI, examines my knee some more and proclaims I have a torn ACL. He pointed it out on the MRI adn it kind of looked like the attached photo. Now they believe that the torn miniscus happened after the initial ACL tear

Bottom line? I have the operation, I'm out of work for a full week. I then wear a brace and walk with a cane for a month. Then three months of physical therapy to build the knee and leg back up. No driving for a month (I work out in Horhsam for crying out loud). No rugby until Spring 2007.

On top of the kitchen rennovations and my job search, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't starting to get stressed.

2006-05-30T18:20:00.000-04:00

The Shade Chronicles

Mooney kept the pad most of the trip so I assume these and all the ones I can't recall right now will turn up at some point, but they're too good to hold onto for any longer.

Here are the Bingham Cup 2006 Shade Chronicles, because when you have this many gay people in one place, there will be shade. Feel free to add any you feel should be included and I'll get them up ASAP.

"I gots some Casey pheremones y'all spread em around. I'm taking mine to the Eagle, I know what I'm doing!" - Malcolm after asking Casey to pee in a bottle on the train

"Yeah, thanks Malcolm" - Martino after being told for the eighth time "oooh look a plane"

"Do I need my Metrocard?" - Edwin after being told we're taking two separate trains to our destination in Chelsea

"Boo I'm top modeling!" - Q after squatting over a Poland Spring bottle. Endorsements are pending

"I love Beyonce, I'm gonna drop it like its hot for her" - Matty, who then proceeded to drop it like its hot for Beyonce

"I just want to help out the cute Aussie guys" - Chris Helms after offering painkillers to the Welsh Cardiffs

"No! No! No! Its not Minnesota its Minneapolis" - Ray while we were watching the Mayhem play

"Oh my God! Phil's dangling!!" - The entire team during Phil's zulu

"But my birthday is in January" - Coach after being presented with a birthday cake at Dallas BBQ and having the entire restaurant sing him Happy Birthday

"That was like when Julia Roberts married Lyle Lovett" - Damian

"Yes Casey we know your philosophy" - Mooney in response to Casey saying "Just because you sit on it doesn't make you a top"

"Let's see her off cycle before we decide to get into it" - Malcolm in response to Martino pointing out a muscled rugger

"I just wanted to come over and see if I'm going to make out with anyone. Hmmmm....no guess not" Izzy from the Boston Ironsides sizing up some Gryphons that just didn't quite measure up.

"Uhhhh....Arnie and Crazy are asleep and I'm having sex" Matty receiving a late night phone call that he just shouldn't have answered

2006-05-29T22:26:00.000-04:00

Sunday May 28, Final day of Bingham competition

The first game of the day was going to be against Boston around 10am. Newly schooled on how to take NYC transportation to the event, we all walked to Grand Central Station from the hotel and waited on the platform with the Ireland team. There was a little saltiness between the sleeping/non-sleeping factions of the room from the night before, but it generally worked itself out by the time we got to the pitch.

On the train we joined in with the Irish to sing an incredibly handsome member of their team "Happy Birthday". He was wearing a bright red shirt and soon his face matched it. A quick bus ride after the train and we arrived at the pitch with little fuss. It made me feel kind of stupid paying for the previous two days worth of cabs actually.

We didn't have much time when we got to the pitch so all the players immediately starting warming up. The match against Boston was a test of wills. Both teams seemed to be evenly matched. Going into the half the score was 3-0 Boston, who managed to kick one through the uprights about 5 minutes before halftime. Unfortunately neither team scored in the second half and the win went to Boston. While visions of winning our division had fueled the previous night's mayhem at Dallas BBQ, nobody was disappointed in our performance. That match, and indeed the entire tournament, could have gone either way at that point.

One small comment though, when you have a referee who is setting up a scrum after both teams and sidelines have been screaming at her "MAN DOWN!!" and pointing at the guy who's been knocked out for 90 seconds on the pitch, you kind of realize you're not getting the highest quality of referee. I'm just saying.....

Shortly after our match we learned that we would be playing Austin for third palce around 1pm. We had enough time to grab some lunch and soak in the last day of Bingham competition. Everybody was dirty, beat up and dead tired but we were still having a lot of fun.

Some weird initial drama about our respective uniforms resembling each other too much gave way to a great final match of rugby. We picked up one of the guys from the LA team who had gotten knocked out of the competition early. His name eludes me at the moment, but he's the one in the lineout in the attached photo. Thanks again mystery LA dude!

Everyone on the sidelines gave whatever was left of their voices screaming during this match. It just seemed like we always had a forward pack 5 meters before the try line inching forward. What do you do in this situation? Why yell "DRIIIIIIIIVE!!!!!" until you almost pass out and fall backwards (thanks again to that big red bear who caught me).

The game was close but the Gryphons ended up winning the match. Afterwards everyone gathered together to end the season and say goodbye for the summer. Much to my shame I started to cry. It was mainly because I hadn't gotten to play. I think the reality set in at that point. If only I had gotten my knee checked out by competant doctor sooner when I first injured it last fall. Maybe more physical therapy could have helped. I'm sure I could have done something on the pitch to the help the team and felt awful that I didn't.

Ehhh...whatever. You can box yourself in with that kind of thinking and to quote Arnie when asked why he was standing outside the smoking section at a bar "I'm better than that".

At least the New York Times photographer was there to capture my moment of shame. I mean nobody reads that paper....right?

I composed myself by walking to the beer tent with Malcolm. By the time we got back to the Gryphons tent I was okay. Everyone made plans to go watch the final match for the cup between San Francisco and Sydney. They were playing on the astroturf field we played on last fall for the East Coast Invitational. I enjoyed this field better than the crack whore nightmare that is the grass pitch NYC provides, but again I heard many complaints from the Europeans. I'm really curious to see a European pitch actually after hearing how nice they are.

In any event, the sun was brutal in the stands. The match was spent admiring the level of play that big clubs like SF and Sydney bring to the sport and trying to not die of sunstroke. When Sydney scored their first try, an Aussie streaked across the field wearing their flag. Nothing we hadn't seen at a hundred or more rugby games.

Then the drama came. An NYC queen with a high voice and an even higher sense of self importance got on the microphone and in the most impertinent tone she could muster started to soundly berate the Australians for their streaking. "I'm going to call the cops if I see any more nudity!" "I want an acknowledgement from that side of the field" "Hello?" "I said I want an acknowledgement" "Stop the match until I get an acknowledgement"

This went on for about ten minutes with the heat stroked crowd getting angrier all the time. It was around this time that I developed what had been an annoyance towards the city of New York into full blown hatred. This tired queen didn't care that the crowd was hot and getting burned. She was going to have her 10 minutes in the limelight on the microphone wielding whatever power was bestowed unto her by the tournament. Forget that every team there was running zulus all weekend. Forget that the event itself lasted like 10 seconds and was in front of a rugby crowd. No, scratch that, a GAY rugby crowd.

It was a methaphor for how the entire tournament was run up to that point with bad pitches, lame parties and absentee hosts. She's just lucky she wasn't stamping her little foot in front of me during all this as I would have gladly risked arrest to shove that microphone straight up her ass.

She never got her "acknowledgement" but eventually the match got underway again. Sydney won by about 15 points. We made our way back to the city via the special buses that had been set up for Cirque du Soleil which was occuring behind the pitch. Once again we watched the bus zip past the people waiting in line at the rugby area. Poor bastards.

We showered/changed and went to the after party. Expectations were high, but we got cold eggrolls, stale chips and salsa and an open bar consisting of Budweiser. Someone needs to explain to me why this would entail charging $65 per person to get in. I could put that on for 2,000 for under $5K easily.

Once the open bar ended at 9pm I headed outside and stayed there. Between being sad for not playing, tired from partying, and heat stroked I was beat. I smoked cigarettes and mostly kept to myself. Mooney found me at one point and we went in to have a beer. Then back outside. I could feel that I was sullen, but what are you gonna do?

Around midnight a group from the Irish team told us about a bar around the corner that had $3 beers. An alcohol buzz sounded good at that point so we gathered room #735 and the guy from LA that played for us and headed over. I think I inadvertantly offended the Irish team with a comment I made about their ability to find cheap beer. Trust me guys, I meant no offense.

We hung out there for a couple of hours with the Irish. Around 2am it was clear that Edwin had been a little over-served. Casey was holding court in the corner with five Irish guys around him clutching beer in awe. Work it Casey. Work it. Mooney and I left him to that and poured Edwin into a cab to head back to the hotel. We watched him pass out and then did one last night of partying in the elevator. At 4am we called it a night.

The whole weekend was a blast. Thanks to everyone who helped make it happen. I've never been prouder to be a part of this team.

Most fun event: Partying until 4am in New York City with my team

Least fun event: The closing party (ironically)

Best quote: "Ewww! Sore pussy, I wonder what that feels like" - Malcolm

"Yeah queen, like you don't know" - Martino

Final quote: "We'll always have New York"

Great job guys!

2006-05-29T21:02:00.000-04:00

Saturday May 27, Day 2 of Bingham competition

We got to sleep in today. Well, until 8am anyway. Once again we cabbed it to the pitch, though now we were starting to look at how much cash was flying out of our pockets.

Again, Welcome to New York.

Our first game was against Portland. It was clear the minute the Gryphons stepped onto the field that 48 hours as a team in a strange city was having a bonding effect. Everyone played together, which is important in all team sports but seems to be particularly important in rugby (which is why its the best team sport ever).

The forwards won most of the scrums and lineouts. The backs started to settle down their passes and increase their speed. In short, those guys looked amazing out there.

The score going into the first half was 15-0 in our favor. 3 tries in 20 minutes. Nicely done guys.

The second half was a little more even sided. The day was much hotter than Friday and fatigue was definitely settling in. Each team ended up scoring a try for a final score of 20-5 (that's my recollection and I'm sticking to it). With a record of 2-1 our second match of the day was set for 4pm against the Chicago Dragons.

We had a ball goofing around in the tent all afternoon waiting for our match. The pitch directly in front of our tent was in use for the first time that day and we got to watch Manchester take a heart-breaking double overtime loss against Gotham. It was the first time I saw ruggers actually crying, but it wouldn't be the last time during the weekend.

The back of the tent turned into an impromptu massage parlor. The Nop/Ray massage session was particularly long. Anything to help out international relations in these troubled times. Everyone was silly and giggling. Those that weren't passed out anyway (though we had fun with them too as the attached picture will show).

When the game arrived at 4pm everyone was in good spirits. Once again the Gryphons rose to the occassion and won. The final score was 5-0 and was hard fought. The poor quality of the refereeing throughout the entire weekend was evident unfortunately. Several potential tries for our side were called back. One that was particularly egregious was a backwards pass to Malcolm who was wide open and eyeing the try zone. The ref called it back as a forward pass. I'm still surprised Coach John didn't spontaneously combust at that moment. Special shout out to Phil for his first try and dangling zulu.

With our day 2 record of 3-1 everyone was on that special sports high rugby gives you. Space inside cars was limited so Malcolm agreed to lead a small group of us on the bus back to Manhattan. Then we saw the line. About 500 ruggers deep. We walked across the street to see what was there and found another bus stop with about 20 people waiting at it. We caught the bus there and then watched it loop around and not pick up one damn rugger. We laughed at the time, but in retrospect it was indicative of poor planning. I mean a simple sign would have directed people to the right stop.

Again, Welcome to New York.

We got back to the hotel and showered/changed for dinner at Dallas BBQ in Chelsea. Got there around 8pm and were led downstairs to where large parties were kept. 20 Gryphons at a corner table and a bunch of barbecue loving New Yorkers. I ordered a ridiculously large margarita and got ready for the evening. A group of 8 black ladies came in and sat next to us. As the tequila started kicking in the two tables engaged in massive call outs to each other. After the meal we brought Coach a birthday cake. His birthday is in January of course, but he's done a lot of work for the team. The look on his face as they brought it out was priceless.

We went to the party the Renegades were throwing a few blocks away afterwards. I was pretty beat so I just headed back to the hotel after a drink with Casey. We saw Matt and Q outside talking to a Kings Cross player and hung out for a bit. Shortly afterwards Mooney came with his friend who lives in town. We went up to the room to mix a cocktail. Unfortunately Edwin and Casey had already gone to bed. When we started playing comedy skits off of Mooney's iPod and laughing our asses off the roommates starting to become annoyed.

We took the hint, went downstairs to finish our drinks and then went to bed.

Most fun event: Dinner at Dallas BBQ

Least fun event: Getting off Randall's Island

Best quote: "Okay she's not a whore, she's just a slut"

2006-05-29T19:27:00.000-04:00

Friday May 26 - Day 1 of Bingham competition

The day began at 7am with only a slight hangover. We didn't really know how to navigate public transportation to the pitch yet so we just called a cab. It was $20 but quick and convenient. We got to the field around 9am and found our assigned tent. Much to our delight we found ourselves sharing an area with the Amsterdam team "Nop". We were sure this was an acronym for something, but found out later that "nop" is Dutch for the knob on cleats. Now you know.

Our first game was at 11am so the team spent some time getting adjusted to the surroundings and then getting warmed up. The first game was against Dallas. Unbenownst to me, who had joined the team in 2005, there was some sort of rivalry from the LAST Bingham Cup held in London 2004. Apparently the Gryphons won their division that year by beating the Dallas team. I thought it was kind of silly to hold a grudge, but it was an added layer of drama to the opening game and you KNOW the girls love the drama.

The Gryphons were unfortunately a little rusty and lost to Dallas by about 15 points (the exact final score eludes me at the moment). Though we had great turnout for the event, attendance at practice has been sparse this past season. It showed in this match in that the team didn't look much like a, well, team.

Not that we were EVEN going to dwell on it as we had a match with Ireland scheduled for 3pm. We wandered back to the tent and had Subway sandwiches. With the whole afternoon to kill and tired as hell, we basically just got into the eye candy parading around the tent. We also had fun cheering on our Nop neighbors. Hell at one point we were cheering on everybody who walked by our tent. As Malcolm put it "we are SO going to get the spirit stick!".

We found out shortly before the match against Ireland that one of their players had broken his femur earlier that day. The Europeans in general were unimpressed with the quality of the pitches we were playing on that day. In Europe rugby is taken very seriously. Playing on rock hard pitches with rocks and glass as we were would never happen.

Welcome to New York

On the positive side, the Gryphons came together during the Ireland match and started to look really good. We won by about 20 points, lifting our spirits a bit from the earlier day's loss.

I caught a ride back to the hotel with Brian and Will who had come up that morning. We had about a half hour to relax before we met the team down in Chelsea at Gym for drinks. We hung out there for a bit and then went to a party the LA team was throwing at the Eagle. There was food and everyone seemed really nice. More importantly, the drinks were reasonably priced. We headed back to the hotel around 11pm to engage in another round of riding the elevators back and forth from the room to the lobby with Mooney. This night we met some guys from the Cardiff team who were quite fun. Apparently a lot of guys on their team were hurt as well, but that wasn't stopping them from having a blast.

We turned in after a bit to get ready for day 2 and our match against Portland.

Most fun event: Watching the Gryphons begin to gel as a team and beat Ireland

Least fun event: Learning the complicated rules that prevent one from enjoying a smoke AND a drink at the same time in NYC

Best quote: "Boo I'm top modeling!"

2006-05-29T18:52:00.000-04:00

Thursday Arrival at Bingham

Thursday began with an ominous sign, all trains to New York along the northeast corridor were cancelled due to a power outage on the Amtrak line. Mass panic in the form of my cell phone ringing off the hook ensued. I made some half hearted efforts to look into parking or taking the Path, but the trains were back up by 11am and by noon we were on our way.

A quick train into NYC from Princeton and soon we were at the hotel. A quick look at the beefy men with European and Australian accents and we knew we were in the right place. After a quick lunch and a shower we headed over to the opening night party at Spirit. Yeah we had no idea where it was either.

Of course this being an NYC event, they weren't ready for us. We got there at 7:15 and waited in line for an hour before we got in. Open bar from 8-10 apparently meant all the Budweiser you care to wait in a long ass line for. There was food, which ran out after feeding about 20 of us. The people who bought VIP passes at least were treated to cookies. They still had to wait in line with everybody else, wait at the same bars and eat the same food, but they got cookies.

We were unimpressed.

Malcolm and I talked to a French player for a while. His team didn't attend the event, but two members from Paris did. Malcolm was over me when I started "spitting French" and we soon migrated to the smoking section where we remained until around 11pm when we went back to the hotel. Mooney and I weren't playing the next day so we basically continued the partying by mixing cocktails and hanging out in the lobby. Arnie, Q, Matty and Crazy had an underwear party in their room. We had a blast meeting people. Well everyone except the weird gay line dancers who were also having some sort of event at the hotel.

All and all a very enjoyable first day.

Most fun event: Seeing all the gay ruggers take over a NYC hotel

Least fun event: The opening party (ironically)

Best quote: "Casey pheremones y'all...spread em around!"

2006-05-29T18:46:00.000-04:00

Uh yeah, about that live blogging....

Just got back from Bingham Cup where the Philadelphia Gryphons took third in their division. Our tournament record was 4-2.

Turns out finding the time to blog live from an event like this is nearly impossible. I'm going to sit down right now and write up as much as I can remember for each day.

2006-05-25T08:04:00.000-04:00

Fun though it may be

The two posts below had my sides aching this morning. Alas, as much fun as it is to point out the mendacity and stupidity of the far right whack jobs running this country, every once in a while you just need a break from it all. This is the final Philly post before I head up to NYC for the Bingham Cup

Look for live blogging from the matches with photos as well as freshly spilt tea on all the nightly hijinx.

2006-05-25T07:54:00.000-04:00

...And speaking of lying weasels

Its finally come to this. A leading light of the Republican Party is lying to sell protein shakes

Looking up obscure passages in Leviticus about gay marriage is way too advanced for this guy. He needs to go back to the basics, like "Thou Shalt Not Lie".

2006-05-25T07:45:00.000-04:00

Tom Delay officially a moron

Apparently Tom Delay really believes that the Colbert Nation is on his side.

Stupid AND greedy? Get in line girls I saw him first.

2006-05-21T19:52:00.000-04:00

The Console Wars...are we all losers?

So the annual gaming expo E3 has come and gone. The hype of course surrounded the next gen consoles. Xbox has already made their debut with the X360. The initial game launch lineup was pretty damn weak in my opinion, but things seem to be shaping up with Elder Scrolls: Oblivion.

Of course Sony is bringing out the Playstation 3. With the much lauded Cell processor, Blue Ray disc player and (finally) a deep online portal this is certainly nothing to sneeze at.

Nintendo is coming at ya with Wii (pronounced "we", how precious is that). This one of course has their brand new controller that promises to revolutionize how we play games. Wanna open a door, move the controller forward. Wanna swing a sword in game, brandish the controller and start swinging.

They all look good in certain respects. I'm definitely down with the Wii if for no other reason than it is backward compatible with all Gamecube games. In addition, previous titles from Nintendo history will be available for download in the unit's hard drive. Never found the secret areas in Super Mario Brothers 3? Now's your chance loser.

What's a geek to do faced with these choices?

At $599 the Playstation 3 is ridiculously priced. There's no way I'm paying that much for a console. I'll wait until it falls down in price a bit. I like that its backwards compatible with PS2 and even PS1 games (!) and their free online service promises to be every bit as robust as Microsoft's.

Another part of me is just exhausted with all the hype. A few notable exceptions aside, aren't these all basically the same? Microsoft and Sony games are virtually indistinguishable from each other. I know, I know its early but still. More WWII first person shooters, awesome guys. Halo 3 is coming, uh yeah that should be fun. Even the Wii's coolest feature of downloadable classic games is basically just a nostalgia trip.

I guess I'm taking a wait and see attitude, but if anything this year's E3 is making me lean towards becoming a PC gamer. There are great MMORPG's on the way based on Lord of the Rings and Star Trek. There are great new Macs that will run Windows and give me all that great Mac OS goodness. Why do I want to jump into "the console wars"? Unless I see some really compelling games coming forward soon, I'm afraid the answer may be "I won't".

2006-05-21T13:22:00.000-04:00

Kitchen Begins To Take Shape

Well after an exremely busy Saturday and half the day today, the kitchen is beginning to look...well...like a kitchen again. The cabinets are up on the walls and the island that will separate the two rooms is starting to take shape.

There's still plenty to do this week in terms of getting supplies, putting up the doors, ordering the granite countertop etc. etc. etc.

But you know what? To hell with all that. I'm going to eat lunch and then head over to a rugger party to get ready for the Bingham Cup later this week.

2006-05-19T11:37:00.000-04:00

Great week for the Angry Little Tank

I started this blog just about a week ago and I have to say its been a blast! Even more amazing (and humbling) to me, people I've never met before have found it and have given me some pretty flattering feedback.

Thanks guys! You're definitely inspiring me to keep this thing (whatever it is) going.

Blogging will be light the next few days as the contractor comes in tomorrow morning to start setting up the new kitchen cabinets. Our friend Larry is coming over tonight to help us run all the new electrical wiring. I've got to run out to Ikea to exchange/replace the cabinets we need as the first purchase we made seems to have been a little off.

In short, there's a million things going on with the house.

I'll blog when I can and post pics of the progress - promise!

Keep an eye out next week for live blogging from The Bingham cup. I won't be able to play due to the knee injury, but I'll be there to cheer on the Philadelphia Gryphons and party my ass off at night.

Until then!

2006-05-17T21:13:00.000-04:00

My Neighbors Suck

There's no secret we've been having a lot of trouble with our neighbors. Two odious lesbians moved in about 2 years ago on the next street over and immediately decided they were going to cut down the 90 foot trees behind their property on our street, lay down ugly brown gravel, and put up a chain link fence. Now they ram their Jetta into the small space. You guys uglied that up real good, thanks again.

Then there are the residents on 22nd street. They've decided that its too much hassle to keep their trash in their back area and then place it in the front of their property like normal people. No, its much easier to just place their trash in front of OUR property. The earlier on Sunday the better too, let's say around noon. Since out of sight IS truly out of mind, there clearly is no need to move the empty cans back to their property after the trash has been picked up on Monday. No, clearly its much easier to just leave them strewn across our street or in front of our property.

Well lately I've been losing it. If I come home from work on Tuesday I've been tossing the empty receptacles over the fence and into their yard. People with even a modicum of sense and conscience would take the hint and at the very least make sure their empty cans are back on their property.

Not these guys.

So anyway, Tuesday night I come home to empty cans in front of our house and just lost it. I tossed the empty cans back over the fence. Suddenly a 300 pound woman comes storming out of the house enraged. It was basically on at that point. Obscenities were traded back and forth, to put it mildly. Around the time I was telling her that her "fat ass" needed to stop putting her trash on our street she decided to pick up the trash can lid and brandish it.

Yes ladies and gentlemen I then found myself under the completely ridiculous situation of being hit with a plastic trash can lid in front of my house by a rather obese red faced woman.

I never thought I would experience the level of rage I felt at that moment. A crystalline pure rivulet of hate ran up the back of my spine and settled in the reptilian area of my brain. The little slugger must have realized what she was doing at that point because she kind of just dropped the lid, muttered "faggot" and then went back to her property. She turned around again, I looked her straight in the eye and said "bitch, get your fat ass into that fucking apartment before I call the cops and have your dumb ass arrested for assault". She took the hint.

Not my proudest moment. The sad thing is, I'm sure she's just going to keep doing it. Next step? Send a letter to her landlord (yeah she's a renter, a bonus to the entire situation) and copy the streets department. Thom's idea was to involve our block captain, but we'll see the rapture before we see any action come out of that.

To be continued

2006-05-15T19:34:00.000-04:00

Harvard, you ain't what you used to be

There's something supremely satisfying in watching a venerable institution like Harvard laid low by the idiotic hijinks of its graduates. Remember all of the bragging back in 2000 about how we were getting the "CEO President" who was going to run the country like a finely tuned corporation with his Harvard Business School training. I bet Harvard wishes you didn't.

Now we find out that Bush's "body man" Blake Gottesman is going to be leaving behind the glamor filled days of "carrying the President's Purell" to attend Harvard Business School. Of course he never got his undergraduate degree, but damnit that won't matter a lick at Harvard - clearly the most venerable institution in the land (snicker).

2006-05-15T19:14:00.000-04:00

There's Something About Mary

Is there anything more pathetic than Mary Cheney calling John Kerry "slime" for daring to bring up her lesbianism during the 2004 election?

For starters, you were the LGBT representative for Coors. If the cliched butch haircut wasn't tipping people off, I'm gonna guess this did. Secondly, your lesbianism was brought up in the context of refuting what your loathsome father and his little hand puppet Bush had wrought in the runup to the election by demonzing gays at every turn.

Where were you then Mary? Seething in silence in your parents' mansion? Whining to daddy about how unfair it all was, but only in the privacy of your ski villa in Jackson Hole?

Better yet Mary, tell us how you feel about having your loathsome little tribe imply that Kerry inflicted his own wounds in combat (combat Daddy just couldn't muster the balls to participate in)? Is that "slimey" sweetie? Make the stomach turn a little bit? Or is this sort of thing only bad when its directed towards the knuckle dragging cretins you call a family.

If anybody is thinking of buying this confused little brat's attempt to make one final cash in on her contradictory existence, don't bother I can sum it up for you right here:

I eat pussy. My dad's the vice president. The end.

2006-05-15T19:07:00.000-04:00

Game Back On!

Just got back from the orthopedic surgeon concerning my recurring rugby related knee injury. Turns out there is a small tear on my cartilage, but no damage to the ligaments. The injury can be repaired via a simple surgery this coming June. I should be back on the pitch in the fall.

It was really hard having to sit out the spring season, this is some of the best news I've gotten in a while.

2006-05-14T18:51:00.000-04:00

I don't know whether to find the Catholic Church's hysterical reaction to the upcoming Da Vinci code movie pathetic or just plain stupid.

Get it straight people! Jesus Christ was not married and his descendants do not walk amongst us today. He was born to a virgin, walked on water and arose from the dead.

Sheesh.....

Oh yeah - I'll be first in line to buy tickets on Friday. Pissing off the right kind of people can be SO satisfying.

2006-05-14T16:50:00.000-04:00

The Droid Strikes Back (kinda)

The right wing noise machine hauled out one of their sacred cows today in the form of Laura Bush . Hey, who can't love a woman that jokes about her husband manually masturbating a farm animal right? Well, unsurprisingly she came off as alternately clueless and disingenuous.

Apparently it is beyond the realm of comprehension for her that people are mightily pissed out there and we're not all looney left wing commies ready to tear down the pillars of capitalism and install Michael Moore as czar. I mean after all, everybody SHE'S been meeting has been supportive.

"I travel around the country. I see people, I see their responses to my husband. I see their response to me," she said.

"As I travel around the United States, I see a lot of appreciation for him. A lot of people come up to me and say, 'Stay the course'."

Laura Laura Laura. Do me a favor sweetie. Step outside your bubble and engage in people who don't traffic in far right sycophantic worship for a day or two. You may find it illuminating.

2006-05-13T14:16:00.000-04:00

Damn you vile woman!!!!

Just finished taking down our very dilapidated kitchen cabinets and generating general mayhem in the kitchen. I remember when we first bought this house three years ago we were told that we were getting a former section 8 housing unit. Of course I had no idea what the ramifacations of this might be, I was just interested in an affordable space in center city.

Then we started finding things. Vile things. Awful things. Crack burns on the plastic sink. A stove hood that looked as though it had been through a grease fire. Nastiness.

And what did we find today? Nothing less than a full blown insect Auschwitz. Thousands upon thousands of dead cockroach shells embedded behind all of the wall cabinets. Did you know cockroaches actually shit? Neither did I, but once the cabinets came down the blackened walls gave testiment to the evacuatory capabilities of our insect brethren.

This post is for you former resident Sadie and your six wild ass kids. You suck. Windex is like $2 bitch, what's the problem. Even poor folks can clean their crib when its dirty. You let this go and then skipped out. You allowed your former landlord to call an exterminator to eradicate your fifth circle of hell. Then the bodies piled up and now we're dealing with it. You are a vile nasty repugnant woman. You are most definitely NOT invited to the fabulous party we're throwing when we've installed our new kitchen.

Sadie, you are dead to me.

2006-05-13T11:59:00.000-04:00

Welcome to the very post posting on Angry Little Tank! I've gotten the urge to write recently and lord knows I've got plenty of strong opinions so my own blog seemed like a good fit.

Also, I miss the days of "Mike's Grooves" my old internet radio station. Shortly after I was written up in the Philadelphia Inquirer the whole damn thing just collapsed. Bonus points to anyone that can name the final song broadcast. I miss connecting with people online (I mean that in a non-sexual context btw). This blog will allow me to express myself in a more traditional sense. I'm starting out here on the free site but plan to migrate this over to a Macintosh site within the next year.

Why not now? Well you need OS 10.3 That would be easy enough I grant you, but then the new Macs came out that will run Windows XP (can the apocalypse be far behind?). So now I want one of those. I'll most likely get it next spring in time for the beta testing to start on the new Star Trek MMORPG. Windows is going to turn me into a PC gamer I know it.

What will this blog be? Damned if I know. Those interested enough to find it will find postings in the coming weeks on my job search, my knee injury, my rugby mates, kitchen rennovations and lots of hot steamy sex.

And oh yeah, probably a few rants about the asshats currently running this country.